


Growing up without You

by Kaname84, TyyTyy



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Teacher Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-26
Updated: 2020-04-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:27:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22903969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaname84/pseuds/Kaname84, https://archiveofourown.org/users/TyyTyy/pseuds/TyyTyy
Summary: Eren had a connection with a certain college professor that seemed to be ignorant of the whole affair. Levi slowly remembers the details the more Eren blatantly shows his intentions, ready to make good on an old promise. Levi wants nothing to do with it and tries to get his student to see reason. However, the younger man isn't keen on the idea. Eren's not giving up no matter what.
Relationships: Levi/Eren Yeager
Comments: 10
Kudos: 28





	1. Chapter 1

**We do not own Attack on** **Titan** **or it's characters.**

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**Chapter 1- Levi**

Things didn't always work out in my favor. It wasn't even that I expected them to, but sometimes a little normalcy would be nice. I'd grown and changed over the years, moving my teachings from preschool—to high school—and now college. After two years at a local college that I had gotten used to, I was now transferring to another thanks to budget cuts.

It wasn't like it was much of a problem, the new school was no further than the old but it was nicer—and larger. I wasn't sure if I was looking forward to it or not. But today was the first official day of class. I'd already attended meetings and got my classroom as I liked, but these were new students for me. My last class wasn't bad and I hoped this class wouldn't be either.

Chemistry. I would have a full day, four classes from morning to late afternoon. I would be teaching third year students only. Analytical chemistry 1 and 2 and physical chemistry 1 and 2. I had always loved chemistry, anything related to science and I was passionate about teaching it to others.

Physical chemistry 1 was my first class of the day. I got into class thirty minutes early and sat at my desk with my coffee and pulled out the lesson we would be covering today. It was just after I had a sip of my coffee that the door opened and in walked a young man. A student, well dressed in slacks and a white button up long sleeved shirt. He even wore a tie. Very sharp and if he was coming to class so early, I could only assume that he was serious.

I would definitely consider him a _pretty boy_ , his brown hair was neither short nor long and looked particularly soft and he had striking turquoise eyes. He looked surprised and also excited to see me, smiling and waving before walking over to stand in front of my desk.

"If you're one of my students, you're pretty early for class." I said as I crossed my legs under my desk and raised my cup for another taste of my coffee.

"I'll be in your care. It's been a while, huh?" He grinned, setting down his briefcase. "The years have been good to you . . . really good. How have you been?"

Who was this kid? "I'm sorry… have we met before?" I asked in confusion.

"Do you not remember me?" He frowned, pouting a little.

I studied him for a moment, trying to think if I had seen him before and then a sudden memory in particular entered my mind at seeing him pout. One of my old students… a kid with big glasses and a perfectly round face, who'd been quite attached to me. No way in hell this was the same kid. He was so tall… and grown. No glasses and his face wasn't round either.

"Can't say that I do." I murmured, refusing to believe those two were one and the same.

He huffed and crossed his arms. "Well that's rude, especially considering what I promised . . ." He said and then sighed. "I guess I'll just have to refresh your memory, but I'm not telling you outright. You'll have to figure it out, Levi senpai."

Oh shit. It was him. My brows twitched as I fought to keep my expression impassive. If he ever called me that again I would probably lose my mind. "I think you're mistaken." I said, unable to come up with anything better. I really didn't expect to ever see him again.

"No, I don't think I am." He said and his grin was back. "So, what do you think? Time has been good to me too, right?"

It most certainly had, but I wasn't about to be feeding his ego. "I couldn't say. Since I don't remember ever meeting you before." I told him and picked up my coffee cup once more.

" _Yet_." He stressed and picked up his briefcase. He moved to the front row and took a seat, pulling out his laptop. "I'll be front and center, Professor Ackerman. Teach me things."

Already, there was no doubt in my mind that this damn brat was going to drive me crazy. I found it amusing and interesting that he'd decided to major in chemistry. But that thought wasn't at the forefront of my mind. No, I couldn't get over the fact that this kid… wasn't a kid anymore and he looked even more determined than ever to wiggle his way into my life.

It was never going to happen.

The remaining students started arriving and the room was filled with a few minutes to spare before class began. It was easy to see that the brat was popular, as many of the other students took time to speak with him before finding a seat. He was so cheeky and I grimaced every time those turquoise eyes drifted to me.

Once class began and I'd taken account for all the students, the fact that the brat was the same kid was secured. Eren Jaeger. It was the same name. All these years though… and I hadn't thought about that boy. He was so young anyway, who would have thought I would end up teaching him again. Even if he was around, there was no sense in thinking about it. I had a job to do, and he'd better be worrying about not failing my class.

I soon found out that not so little Eren Jaeger was an exemplary student. Always early, never missing a single class. Excellent grades and a good attitude. He was always eager for the lessons and quick to volunteer in giving his thoughts. Not once was he wrong or uninterested in a topic we discussed.

Compared to the other students, Eren was a godsend. He certainly kept things interesting and was determined to show me just how capable he was. And even after I came to realize how good he was, he still managed to exceed my expectations. After the first few weeks of classes, I was so impressed that it was hard to keep myself from praising him. But I had to, because he knew. Eren knew he was good—really good and he was always grinning about it. Those eyes were constantly challenging me and I was always up to keep him entertained.

I found myself trying to come up with ways to stump him. For once I wanted him to struggle. I wanted him to need help, without asking questions he already knew the answers to just to get me to talk. But he was too good. There were days I even made the entire class suffer, just so I could see—and he always showed me. His confidence somehow exhilarated me. I was always excited about a new day of class. He was currently in two of my classes each day. Out of his four classes, his first and third were with me.

Brown nosing brat was always extra early to class, sometimes even bringing me coffee. He was just itching to get close to me and he wasn't trying to hide it either. Just this morning he met me in the hallway on my way to my classroom. He was carrying two coffees and greeted me good morning happily. It wasn't until we entered the classroom that he offered me one of the coffees.

"Black, just the way you like it." He said knowingly, that familiar grin on his face.

I accepted the coffee, rolling my eyes. "You should stop bringing me coffee." I muttered on my way to my desk, though I was glad he had because I hadn't taken the time to get a cup this morning.

"Why would I do that? I enjoy bringing you coffee, you enjoy drinking coffee, it's a win win situation." He stated, taking a sip of his own hot liquid.

I sat at my desk after setting all my things down. "Just stop and go sit down." I told him, not liking the way he lingered next to me.

"What if I don't want to?" He asked, challenging me yet again.

"Then too bad. You have to listen to me." It was I who grinned then as I glanced at him.

He hummed and leaned against my desk. "Perhaps. I may have to listen to Professor Ackerman, but Levi senpai is another matter. Guess which one you are right now."

My brows twitched and I struggled to maintain my composure. "You must be joking." I muttered and hoped like hell he would never call me that again.

"I'm always serious when it comes to you." He told me, his grin disappearing. "You might as well give up. Things are only going to get more intense from here on out."

"Oh no they're not." I glared at him. "Get it out of your head kid, it will never happen."

Eren moved forwards and grabbed the armrest of my chair, his face leveled with mine. "You want to bet?" He asked, an inner fire shining in his eyes though his voice was soft and gentle.

How infuriating. "Back off, brat. You're over here wishing for nothing. Take your seat."

He held my gaze for a long moment before he did as I asked. However, I wasn't fooled. I knew this wasn't over.

"Alright then, Professor Ackerman. I'm ready to learn." He said as he sat down.

I didn't like how interested I was in Eren. In fact, it was quite troublesome. He wanted to have my attention and he had succeeded in getting it, but that didn't mean anything. I was a professional teacher and college or not, it was impossible for me to get involved with a student. Still, I found it had been much easier to ignore him when he was still a kid.

Knowing I wouldn't have to deal with him forever though, made me decide that all I had to do was power through and it would all be alright. It wasn't like I'd be seeing him outside of school or anything. And he couldn't try but so hard. I would make it through this year without caving into my carnal desires or Eren's either.

In the meantime, Eren wasn't the person I had to worry about. The biology professor, Hanji Zoe had appeared to have taken a liking to me as well. I had to deal with her every day too. I'd started eating lunch in my classroom to prevent any unnecessary and unwanted encounters, but she took it upon herself to drop by my class for a moment or two, almost every day.

It was on one day while I was sitting at my desk eating lunch and she had come by, that Eren happened to waltz into the classroom. My eyes narrowed at seeing him, especially since Hanji was so close and couldn't have been more suggestive. Those turquoise eyes that were always watching me darkened and I didn't miss the smirk that pulled at his lips before he forced a frown on his face.

"Sorry to interrupt, but I had some questions about our assignment Professor Ackerman." He stated with uncharacteristic professionalism.

What a sly brat.

"Oh well," Hanji straightened and smiled at Eren. "You'd better help him, Professor Ackerman."

I sighed as she left, feeling like I was the one in need of help. Throwing what was left of my sandwich in the trash, I started organizing my things as Eren approached my desk. Smart brat could have probably taught the class as well as I could, so I knew he didn't need my help with anything.

"What is it that you need my help with, Jaeger?" I asked casually while busying myself with grading some papers from this morning's classes.

"Bonds." He said simply as he walked closer. "My atoms want to bond with your atoms, but you're only interested in a weak covalent bond. I'd rather go the ionic route, nice and strong."

I almost laughed but managed to swallow my amusement. "That has nothing to do with your current assignment." I said as I moved to the next paper that needed grading. It was his and it was perfect as always. I picked it up to show it to him when I graded it. "Look, I think you'll manage perfectly fine on your own."

"I don't know, I am here for a reason after all. And you have a degree so I'm very eager to learn from you." He smiled and crossed his arms. "Come on Professor, teach me all about your chemistry."

I wasn't sure if he was ever going to give up, but my chances weren't looking good. "Unfortunately, it's lunch time and class is not in session. So I'm not at liberty to teach you anything."

"Shame." He mused, but he didn't look that disappointed. "And here I thought we could have a one on one learning experience. Maybe tomorrow?"

"Never." I grumbled, returning my attention to the remaining papers on my desk. "You should really let it go."

"You should remember the past." He huffed, playfulness gone.

I did remember but that wasn't going to change anything. "Why should I?" I asked quietly while smiling over the current paper, it was all wrong. Nothing like Eren's.

"Because this time, things are different." He said with more conviction than ever. "I'll let you get back to grading, Levi senpai."

Eren left after that, the sound of the door clicking echoing in the empty classroom. Breathing a sigh of relief, I concentrated on my papers and wasn't looking forward to my next class because he would be back. I wasn't sure how to go about making him realize nothing was ever going to happen between us. Luckily my next two classes weren't bad and the day ended with no more issues.

My home life was simple. I cleaned, cooked and went over which lessons I would be teaching the next day. Sometimes I would read and other times I would go out for a walk, but my life was always just this simple. That was why I loved teaching, because it was the most entertaining part of my day.

After school today though, I switched things up. It was obvious that I needed something to occupy my free time and give me something to think about, so I went by the shelter and thought I'd adopt a pet. Pets had to be as entertaining as kids. And a pet would have to be a lot more tame than some of those kids… like Eren.

I'd never had my own pet so I wasn't sure if I wanted a cat or a dog but I definitely wanted one I could keep inside. A cat seemed like the most obvious choice, they were calm and relaxed as opposed to dogs more energetic and playful manners. I'd made my decision to get a cat but then when I walked through the kennels and spotted one puppy all alone, just sitting there and staring at me, I stopped and knelt down to get a good look.

A boy, with long brown fur and green eyes. When I rested my hand on the chain link kennel, he moved closer and tried to lick me. He was definitely a cute pup, and for some reason I wanted to take him—so I did. The pup was elated and licked me endlessly as I carried him out of the shelter, but now I had to do some shopping. He would be needing some important things and also a name.

"What are we gonna name you?" I asked as we got into my car and I set him in the passenger seat, going as far as buckling him in. Safety first. "Well if you don't know, I don't know."

I didn't think coming up with a name would be so complicated, but the more I thought about it, the more stumped I was. The two of us went by the pet store where we got some food and toys and other necessities. Since I'd never done this before, I was starting from scratch.

When we got home I took him to the backyard that was fenced in and let him run around for a while. He seemed happy to be able to run and play in the grass instead of being locked in that pin, which was why I'd decided against buying him a kennel. I would train him and if he dared have any accidents there would be consequences.

He was a smart puppy and seemed eager to learn. Over the next few days I spent all my free time with him and he was always stuck to my side. I eventually settled on the name Titan because it seemed fitting and he liked it. He answered to the name right away and I found that it was going to be easy to share my life with him.

I enjoyed having Titan to think about because it lessened my thoughts of a certain student. But on Friday, I learned that that student was more troublesome than I had first anticipated.

Everything seemed normal as I entered my classroom and walked to my desk. I set my things down and pulled out my chair to sit. Just as I scooted my chair to my desk, the door opened and I sighed, already knowing it was Eren. But it wasn't. It was Hanji.

"Good morning, Levi." She greeted me with a smile and I opened my mouth to greet her in return but before I could say anything, I felt something shift under my desk and brush against my legs and then hands were roaming up my thighs.

_What the hell?_ My heart fell and I felt around under my desk until my hand landed on a head. It didn't take me but an instant to realize it was Eren and I was going to have to kill him.

"I was hoping to convince you to have dinner with me at my place." She laughed and my eyes widened as Eren's hands moved further up. I tried to stop him as he went about unzipping my pants. "Why do you look so surprised?"

"Oh uh, this is just so unexpected." I mumbled and took hold of Eren's hair, pulling back hard so he would stop getting closer but then he made a breathless sound that went straight to my groin—and worse, I feared Hanji finding out he was under my desk.

"Not really." She mused as she came a few steps closer but I wasn't seeing or hearing her as Eren's hand reached into my pants and found my member.

This was absolutely humiliating because as much as I should have been repulsed, I was already getting hard. He forced me further under the desk and pulled out my dick, moving closer and not hesitating to graze his lips up it. I shuddered and pulled my hand away to try and look like I was doing something. I couldn't believe this was happening to me.

"So, we could have dinner at your place if you prefer to stay home. Or we could go out." Hanji was still talking.

I raised my hand to my mouth and subtly bit down on it when Eren's tongue suddenly swirled around the head of my cock. How brazen was he? I couldn't play this off… but I had to.

"Sorry… I'm not really interested." I told her, managing to keep my words level even though Eren was licking me repeatedly and I was now suffering from a full on erection.

Hanji didn't seem as if she was going to give up. "But why not? It doesn't have to mean anything… we could just be friends. We have a lot in common."

"Fuck." I hissed when Eren closed his mouth around me and sucked hard and slow. My eyes widened at realizing what had just left my mouth and my heart pounded. "I mean… fuck, you're right."

Hanji laughed. "I knew you'd agree."

No, no I wouldn't. I didn't want anyone trying to get close to me. And yet here I was, a fellow professor trying to get to know me and a student sucking my fucking dick.

I held my breath as he took me in and sucked his way back off slowly, nearly losing it when he pulled his mouth away, breathing heavily against me. I could only imagine the look on his face—how much this turned him on. I wanted to see it. I wanted to watch him go down on me just like this. It felt damn good and I had no interest in stopping him now, but I needed to get rid of Hanji.

My hand combed through and took hold of Eren's hair as he moved his lips back to my tip, I could hear his heavy breathing and in fear of Hanji hearing it as well, I knocked over my bin of pens to cover the sound and then almost moaned when he started again. He was good and I couldn't remember the last time I'd been sucked off since I'd been steering clear of anything related to intimacy.

"Oh, Levi," Hanji moved to come closer and I waved her off.

"No… I'm just… a bit nervous." I breathed as I loudly started picking the pens up. "I'll stop by your ah class later and we will t-talk it over."

Damn brat was going to kill me, my face was on fire and he was as determined to get me off as I was to make him forget about me.

"Okay, sounds good to me. But don't be nervous, we will have fun."

I watched as she walked towards the door, biting my lip to keep from moaning as Eren took all of me into his mouth. My whole body was tense, the need to come building rapidly. As soon as Hanji left, I groaned out a curse and let my head fall back in surrender. He really shouldn't have been so good at this.

Eren never once used his hands aside from holding tight to my thighs. It was all mouth and tongue and he wasn't trying to tease me either, he was determined to make me come and I wasn't going to stop him. I didn't have the will to. Not now. I held tighter to his hair and groaned louder as he took me all in once more and then my member throbbed when his throat rumbled with a moan of his own.

His fingers dug into my thighs as he moved faster, bobbing his head and sucking so fiercely I thought I was going to die. My stomach tightened and my breath hitched as I felt myself reach the brink of ecstasy. Eren quickly moved under the desk, finally wrapping his hand around the base of my cock while sucking firmly on the tip of my member, dragging my orgasm out of me.

My whole body started trembling as I came and I forced him down further on me, completely intoxicated with bliss as he drained me and hungrily swallowed every last drop of semen that escaped me. My hands fell away from his hair as I panted, disappointed in myself for letting this happen. I laid spent in my chair, drained of energy and feeling boneless. How long had it been really? I was never going to be able to look at this kid the same.

Eren pushed my chair back just enough so he could get out, frustratingly looking composed aside from his swollen lips. "So, Levi senpai . . ." He trailed, voice a little raspy and grinning like the cat that got the cream, "Did I fire up your electrons?"

"Tsk." I scowled at my desk and collected myself, still in disbelief. "What the fuck, kid? You can't… I can't believe you… shit."

"I was just as surprised as you when Professor Zoe showed up. It wasn't part of my plan." He said and then tilted his head at me. "Although . . . I'm not a psychology major, but I do hope our extra credit session left you conditioned. Now when you see her, you'll think of this moment won't you?"

I turned my glare to him. "You fucking wish, you damn brat." I was not going to let him think he had one up on me. "The only reason I let that happen is because I didn't want either of us getting in trouble. You can bet your ass I'll be checking under my desk from now on."

He pouted at my promise. "Well that's no fun."

"Just take your fucking seat or something." I groaned, seriously considering leaving for the day. I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to remain as his teacher.

Eren didn't argue. He went back to his seat, sulking. I was so pissed at myself. How could I get myself into such a situation? I was going to get fired… or worse. And Eren just didn't care. He didn't realize how wrong it was. Even if I did decide to play with him, it sure as hell wouldn't be at school. What was I even thinking? It was out of the question. I had to put my foot down once and for all and let him know that I was serious.

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**A/N:**

**A KanaTyy** **collaboration** **XD**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1.5- Eren**

Meeting Levi for the first time was a memory that never failed to make me laugh. I was in fourth grade and he was just starting his teaching career, his demeanor and personality not suited for elementary school. I sat at the back of the class as he stood at the board, writing his name before introducing himself. My classmates were all riled up with leftover summer energy and the excitement of seeing some of their friends again.

I hadn't said a word the whole time, but I could barely hear our teacher's voice. It wasn't hard to tell he was losing his patience and the slight glare he wore grew more intense. The sudden clear and stern order to shut up had everyone turning their heads, eyes wide in surprise. He hadn't yelled, but the two words had never fallen from any of the teachers we knew and most certainly not with that delivery.

The irritation had slowly left his leaden-blue eyes and he introduced himself again in the same tone as the first time. The contrast was unsettling to be honest, but it had everyone's attention. I was intrigued and curious about our new teacher and wished I could create silence with just two words. I was a pretty shy ten year old, not really talkative or restless like my classmates. I guess it was a little odd for a fourth grader, but not completely uncommon.

I was just used to being quiet. Although I was very observant too and keeping a low profile had its advantages. I noticed things a lot of other people didn't, I picked up on things faster than most. That was why Levi had made me laugh. After class had begun and broke for recess, I stayed behind. I waited until everyone else was gone before I got out of my seat and walked over to Levi's desk.

I stared at him from behind my glasses, a frown and raised eyebrow on his face when he looked at me. "Is something the matter?" He asked softly.

I shook my head.

"Are you sure? You can tell me." He said then and smiled at me.

The change in his expression made me part my lips in an 'o' shape. He wasn't what he seemed, not at all. Levi was strict and led the class with a firm hand, but he was also nice and could smile like that. It reminded me of . . .

"You're like a pineapple." I told him quietly. "Hard on the outside, but sweet on the inside." I had him figured out and it was only the first day.

"Well, I haven't heard that one before." He laughed, his entire face lighting up as he reached towards me and ruffled my hair. "That's cute, Eren."

I laughed as well, both at my amazing comparison and the contagious sound of his chuckling. However, it really was funny to me how Levi had tricked the rest of my class. I had no doubt there were some that already didn't like him and all because they had fallen for it. They hadn't looked closer like I had, I was too smart for adult's tricks. I wouldn't tell Levi's secret though, he wanted everyone to see how tough he was so they would behave.

Some of the other kids in my class could be bad and I didn't want them to have an advantage over him. I had to admit I liked being the only one who knew too. I smiled at Levi before I left the classroom to go outside, feeling a little lighter about how the school year would be.

I went over to the sandbox that was right under a big tree, making it a cool and shaded place. No one ever played in the sandbox so I got to be myself as I watched the other kids swing. The swings were the best part of the playground and I always waited patenicelty for a turn, but there was always someone else there. I wasn't really close with any of the other kids and going over there would be awkward. They would stare and then they would whisper and I hated that. I didn't talk much, but at least I didn't talk behind another person's back.

Then there were those that would say things to my face and it was admitting just as bad. The whole interacting thing was better to avoid altogether, so I stuck to my sandbox. Once recess was over, I waited until everyone else had headed back inside before I followed. Class was back in session and I was eager to see more of the kind of teacher Levi would be.

The first week went by smoothly. We kept to a schedule and Levi hadn't raised his voice or glared since the first day. However, it was the calm before the storm. Most of the kids had been waiting, feeling Levi out more and more during the second week. It started off with little things like saying the answer when they weren't called on and passing notes to see how he would react. He ignored them if they called out the answer and never failed to intercept a note, tossing it into the trash without so much as pausing in his lesson.

Then some kids took it two steps further by either not doing their homework and assignments or copying off of someone else. Levi made them stay inside for recess and left notes for their parents to see in their agendas, putting a stop to it quickly.

My classmates were a mix of being intimidated, frustrated and hesitant to try anything else. I remained at the back of the class and watched it all unfold. By the third week some brave souls tried their luck, but the glare was back with a vengeance and Levi wasn't having it. I was the only one who hadn't pulled anything big or small. Though that really didn't help things.

The whole class was painting a negative view of him and they didn't think he was fun, some of the kids went on and on about it at recess. While it was cool that I knew Levi was nice, I didn't like my classmates talking bad about him. It wasn't his fault they weren't doing what they were supposed to do. How could he do anything fun when the class didn't deserve it? It wasn't fair.

At the beginning of the fourth week, I went up to Levi's desk after everyone else had cleared out for recess. I waited patiently for him to finish stacking papers and stared up at him when he turned his attention to me.

"Hey, you're missing playtime." He said, smiling sweetly at me. "And you're really the only one who deserves it."

I just blinked at that, not knowing what to say. But I wanted to say something. Looking at him like this made it all the more frustrating that I couldn't get the words to come out, all I could do was blush at the praise and stare at his shirt instead.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He asked and suddenly moved his hand towards my face, the backs of his fingers rubbing across my cheek. "You're flushed. Are you feeling sick?"

I shook my head.

His brows pulled together as he studied me, pulling my glasses off and laying both his hands on my face. One on my cheek and one on my forehead. "Are you sure? I will take you to the nurse if you think you need to go."

I shook my head again and squinted a bit to see him.

"Aw you're so adorable. Your glasses really hide your pretty eyes. Not that it matters." He chuckled and put my glasses back on my face. "Better?"

I nodded and gave him a shy smile, I wasn't used to so many compliments. I wanted to say something nice too.

"Levi senpai." I said and paused, making sure I had his full attention.

"Hm? What is it, Eren?" He asked, still smiling at me.

"I think you're a great teacher." I told him, thinking that was the best thing to say. And it was true too.

"Stop being so cute." He said, grinning then. "That really means a lot to me. You're the first person to ever tell me that."

My mouth formed an 'o' shape and then I beamed at him. "Really?"

"Really." He ruffled my hair and stood up, offering me his hand. "Let's get you to the playground so you don't miss out. Okay?"

I liked the classroom better than the playground, but I took his hand anyway. We walked outside and my eyes drifted to the swings before I even realized it.

"You want to swing?" Levi asked, catching my gaze.

I ended up shrugging in response. I didn't want to lie to him, but I didn't want him to think I was a coward either. I did want to swing, but I didn't want what would happen after I went over there. I really was unsure.

"Oh look, one just opened up. Come on." He tugged me along to the open swing. "I'm sure you'll like swinging more than the sandbox." He said as he knelt down beside the swing, watching me.

I didn't know how he knew about the sandbox, but he didn't know how the playground worked. "They'll stare . . ." I said quietly, nerves getting the better of me.

"Who will?" He questioned me as he stood straight and went behind the swing. "Come on, get on and I'll push you."

I glanced around, some of the other kids looking at us and I couldn't help taking a step back. My eyes went back to Levi and his expression was encouraging.

"Don't worry about anyone else. Just you and me, okay?"

 _Just me and Levi senpai._ I could do that . . . it would be alright. I took one step forward, testing the waters. The way Levi's eyes lit up made me want to smile and it gave me the courage to keep going. I walked up to the swing and turned around, keeping my gaze on my shoes as I sat down. I grabbed hold of the metal chains as I started to feel excited. I was on the swing.

"Ready?" Levi asked and I nodded. He pulled me back by my seat and pushed me forward, not too fast but it was still exciting. "Is this too high?" He asked as he kept pushing me gently.

"No." I answered as I looked at the skyline. I was definitely smiling now, getting closer and closer to the clouds. "Higher?"

"Okay but only a little." He hummed and pushed me even higher. "Make sure you hold on tight."

I squealed and fell into a fit of giggles. This was so fun, I never wanted to get off. I got so caught up in the moment and before I knew it, recess was over. The swing slowed and I was at a stand still too soon for my liking. Everyone else was heading inside while I stubbornly held onto the metal chains. I didn't want it to end, I didn't want to get off. This was probably my only chance.

"Come on, Eren. You can swing more tomorrow. I promise." Levi told me, coming to stand before me and offering his hand.

I wasn't so sure, but he promised me. I could believe in him and that was what pushed me to grab his hand. Needless to say, Levi pushed me on the swing everyday for the rest of the week and the following one. It seemed like he planned to keep it up for a while and it really made me happy. Things seemed to get better from then on and some of my classmates wanted to get on Levi's good side after seeing how he was with me. I didn't mind other people finding out he was nice, I had been the first to compliment him and that was enough.

The increase in good behavior led to some cool and fun lessons that Levi started doing. That encouraged more kids to hop on the good train, but there were still those who were stubborn and maybe a little bitter. The lessons were becoming harder so he set up a chart and prize system. It was based on both participation and academics. I thought the chart was a great idea at first and the prizes were awesome, but it was the cause of some new problems.

When it came to academics, I was the best. I worked hard at home and I was pretty smart. On the other hand when it came to participation, I was the worst. I didn't do well in group projects or with speaking out in front of the class. No one excelled at both so the top of the chart kepting ending in a tie between me and Sasha. Sasha was the opposite of me, succeeding at participation and failing at academics.

Being at the top of the chart gave me some unwanted attention and Sasha was part of it. She sat on the other side of the classroom towards the middle, her voice one of the louder ones. Most of the girls in class were her friend, but the boys found her daring personality annoying.

I didn't really have an opinion, though that changed once she started sitting next to me at lunch. Sasha had a big appetite and would talk a lot, but the problem was what happened when she didn't get her way. She would sit and try to talk to me for a while and then move back over to her friends once she lost her patience. It wasn't that I was ignoring her, I was listening to everything she said.

I just didn't respond apart from head nods that she never saw because her eyes were on her food. After a little over a week of this new routine, she had had enough. Her words went from friendly to threatening and somehow I wasn't even surprised. I seemed to change a lot of people that way though I didn't know why.

"Okay so it's obvious we're not going to be friends." Sasha said as she sat across from me, finally looking at something other than her food. "I was thinking about teaming up since we always tie for first, but it's not a good idea. This months prize is Mr. Akerman treating the top student to a meal and tying with you again can't happen. I don't want to share."

I didn't know what she wanted me to do about it. I wasn't going to let my grades suffer because of what she wanted, it would disappoint Levi if I started to drop on the chart. As usual I said nothing and I could tell she was trying to read my expression.

"I don't care how you do it, Eren. As long as we don't tie I won't bother you." She told me before getting up to leave.

She was warning me, but I had no clue what she meant. She would bother me? How? Honestly all I wanted was for her to stay away from me, but that didn't seem possible. I wasn't a stubborn person, but I could be. I wouldn't let my grade fall. Once Sasha realized this as more days passed, I would feel her eyes glaring at me during class and at lunch. She kept her distance however, but it gave me a bad feeling.

Pretty soon Sasha and her friends would sit close enough to me at lunch so that I could hear everything they were saying. They made fun of me time and time again until I would leave, not able to listen to anymore of there insults and giggles. It got to the point where I didn't go to lunch and sat outside on the steps to eat. It wasn't any different aside from the location and I was glad to get away from them, but the peace didn't last.

I was caught by surprise when one day a tray of food was dropped over my head while I was eating. My body stiffened as it sat in my hair and ran down my clothes, familiar laughter ringing in my ears.

"Whoops, sorry." One of Sasha's friends said before the little group was walking back inside. Sasha wasn't with them, but that didn't mean she had nothing to do with this.

I felt cold, sticky and smelled like wet tacos. My stomach dropped and my eyes began to sting. I threw my food away and was thankful that no one else had been around to see, to join in and laugh. I felt sick and I wasn't sure how I was going to deal with them if they started doing this every day. It wasn't fair, I didn't do anything to them or Sasha. If she wanted to win so bad then she could have studied more.

It made me angry that they thought I was a push over, but I couldn't deny that I was. I may not have done what Sasha wanted me to do, but I wasn't going to tell on them. It would only make things worse and I was too ashamed to let anyone find out. That just made me angry at myself. I had to peek inside the hall to make sure no one was there before I headed to the boys bathroom, checking to see if it was empty once I went in.

I breathed a sigh of relief at the open stalls and walked up to the sink to look in the mirror, the sight making me feel more pathetic. I could get it out of my hair and use paper towels to wipe my clothes, but I would still smell and have stains on them. My eyes stung again and I shook my head. I had to hurry before someone saw and it wasn't the time to feel sorry for myself. Besides, I wasn't going to cry over those girls, no way. I was ten now, too old for something like that . . . but it still hurt. I took my glasses off and set them down on the sink.

Just as I turned on the faucet, I heard the bathroom door open. I quickly stopped the water and dashed into one of the stalls. The steps grew closer and I paled when I realized I left my glasses.

"Eren… come out of there."

My heart dropped at Levi's voice and I remained silent. Out of all people, it had to be him. I couldn't let him see me like this.

He sighed from just outside of the stall. "Don't hide from me, Eren. What happened?"

How did he know something was wrong? "I don't feel good." I said, knowing better than to think he would accept my silence and leave. He was the only one who wouldn't.

"Then come out and let me walk you to the nurse."

"I . . . I can go by myself." I insisted and hoped he wouldn't press any further. I didn't have it in me to reject him.

"Eren… this floor is disgusting so if you make me crawl under this door I'm going to be very upset."

I raised my hand to the lock, knowing he really would if he had to. I didn't want to open the door . . . but I didn't have a choice. The lock clicked and I slowly pushed the door. My gaze found his shoes, unable to look at his face even if I couldn't see it very well.

"Tsk." He grabbed my hand and hauled me out of the stall to the sink. "Who did this?" He asked, voice muttered as he turned the water on.

I didn't answer. Lying was the last thing I wanted to do, but telling on them would be bad too. He sighed at my silence and moved his hand under the running water to feel it. Then he pushed my head over the sink and started washing my hair.

"You know you're my best and favorite student. Right? I know how you must feel… but I don't want you keeping important things like this from me." He spoke to me as he washed my hair thoroughly, using the hand soap to get the greasy mess out and the smell as well.

Once he finished with my hair he pulled my head back and dried it with paper towels before wiping my face. He'd sighed so many times now.

"You'll have to take that shirt off."

I pulled it over my head and put it on the sink. I couldn't help thinking he was disappointed in me, that he thought I was a pushover too. I didn't like the way it made me feel, not one bit. Levi took off his sweater to reveal a t-shirt, taking that off as well before offering it to me. I quietly thanked him as he put his sweater back on and noted how big it was on me.

"Is that better?" He asked as he knelt in front me, brushing my hair off of my face before putting my glasses back on my face. "You look good as new." He said and smiled then.

The feeling in my chest increased and I teared up again, suddenly wanting to tell him everything. "She dumped her lunch on me . . . one of Sasha's friends." I confessed and wiped my eyes.

"Which friend?" Levi asked as he rubbed my arm soothingly.

"The one that sits in front of her in class." I said and now that it was out there I ended up adding, "I think Sasha told her to do it."

"Why do you think that?" He asked, wanting to get to the bottom of it.

It was strange how easy it was to talk to him and I found that I didn't mind telling him what was going on. "She doesn't want to tie with me for the prize . . . but I wouldn't let my grade drop so she could win . . . I want to keep doing a good job in your class, Levi senpai."

He smiled at me again and stood up, seeming satisfied. "I expect no less from you. And don't worry, I'll take care of this. Let's get back to class."

I nodded and decided to throw my shirt in the trash can. Lunch was over and most of the class was already back in their seats, including Sasha and her friend. Some kids stared at me as I went to my desk, but everyone's attention was on Levi when he asked Sasha and her friend to step into the hall with him. He certainly didn't look happy and I knew they had to be getting a note home for sure. The whole class was back long before the three of them came into the classroom again, Levi looking better now and the girls kept their heads down. Neither of them said a word for the rest of the day and I had a good feeling that that was the end of it.

Levi had taken care of it just like he said he would, I didn't have to worry about it anymore. I actually felt a little guilt not going to him right away. I should have known he would always have my back and wouldn't judge me. He wasn't that kind of person, he was much better than that. He even said that I was his favorite student. I was the best because of my academics, but I was his favorite because he chose me.

It made me want to do the best that I could to make him proud. It was the first time someone other than my dad had gotten me motivated, made me want to give it my all. I didn't know how Levi was able to do that, but he did. I never had a teacher like him before and I was beginning to realize that he inspired me too.

I got to class early the next day, my backpack on my shoulders as I went up to Levi's desk. I looked up at him as he wrote on the blackboard and waited patiently for him to finish. When he turned around he smiled at me, a look I was growing very used to.

"Good morning, Eren." He greeted me softly.

I grinned at him before taking off my backpack and unzipping it. "It's clean." I told him as I held up the shirt he gave me.

"Oh, thank you." He took the shirt happily. "Were your parents upset?"

I hadn't told my dad what happened, but since Levi handled it I didn't think he would have been upset. I shook my head in answer.

"Levi senpai." I said and made sure I had his full attention.

"Yes?"

"For yesterday . . . I wanted to say thank you." I said and gave him a small smile. "Thank you."

Levi chuckled and ruffled my hair affectionately. "I should be thanking you for being so brave and honest. I'm really proud of you."

I looked at him in surprise before beaming at him. "Really?"

"Of course. You're my number one student. I'm always proud of you."

It was the best feeling in the world, it really was. "I'll work hard, Levi senpai."

"I know you will and that makes me happy."

Making him happy . . . yes, that was want I wanted to do. Seeing him happy made me happy. I felt important and bigger than I actually was, it brought me some confidence. I felt like he cared about me and not just because it was his job. I was glad to have his support, to know I could count on him. It was a nice change in my life and the beginning of my change as well. I was still nervous around the other kids and avoided them when I could, but I was better in class. I spoke loud and clear when I raised my hand and answered a question. I didn't say much when we were working in groups, but I gave my input so we would do well. I was still quiet and timid, however I was talking as the weeks passed. At least compared to before I felt like I had a voice in the classroom and that it was heard.

Everyone else had finally accepted Levi completely and I could tell they liked him. He was strict, but he was fair. He recognized effort and rewarded good behavior. It was good to see everyone get along and though Sasha and her friends didn't like me, they kept their distance and didn't cause any problems. As it turned out, Sasha and I hadn't tied for first place on the chart. I got to have a meal with Levi and I hadn't asked for much. Eating lunch in the classroom was fine with me and my only request was that we had hamburgers, they were my favorite. It was fun to sit and eat with him one on one while we talked. I learned he was going to teach fifth grade next year and I hoped I was going to be in his class, I really really hoped so.

The year was going by much faster than I thought it would and the closer summer got the more excited everyone became. Summer was alright, but I was going to miss seeing Levi everyday and there was a chance he wouldn't teach me again next year. He said I could still stop by his classroom and ask him for help when I needed it. That made me feel better, but it wouldn't be the same. A part of me was worried I would lose the little progress I had made and I would go back to being silent and unimportant. I didn't have a desire to be the center of attention, but I wanted to feel like I mattered. That was normal, wasn't it?

I didn't know if I would have the chance to talk with Levi like I did now and even though that made me sad, I had to think about it. He was there to support me, but I couldn't rely on him forever. I would have to learn to do things on my own. I would have to learn how to deal with difficult situations on my own. Nothing too major or adult, there were only so many problems a ten year old could have. Though despite my intelligence, there was a lot of things my classmates had learned that I hadn't. I wanted to learn them from Levi since I had failed to learn them by myself. Even my observance wasn't enough to help me and I ended up asking Levi one day after school.

I stood quietly and waited for him to finished putting away our assignments in his messenger bag. I looked at my hands, already knowing what I wanted to ask first. There was one question, a big one that I needed him to teach me the most. Although it was embarrassing to say out loud.

"Eren?" He spoke questioningly when he noticed me.

I told myself not to be nervous and just go for it. "I have something to ask . . ."

"What is it?" He asked softly but curiously.

"How . . ." I trailed and tried again, looking up at him. I could do this. "H-how do you make friends?"

He looked surprised by my question but after a moment, smiled at me. "Well you should know. We're friends after all."

"We are?" I knew he thought highly of me and I thought the same of him, but I didn't think an adult would be friends with a kid like me. "You . . . you're my friend?"

"Of course. You're very precious to me." He said and then ruffled my hair. "I'll always be your friend."

I didn't know what to say. I was happy, extremely so, but for some reason I also felt like crying. My body moved on its own and the next thing I knew I was hugging him tightly.

"Thank you, Levi senpai." I whispered, fearing that if I spoke any louder my voice would crack.

Levi hummed and wrapped his arms around me, returning the embrace. "You're so sweet, Eren."

It was certain, I would miss him terribly over the summer. My only wish was to be in his class next year and I would make these last weeks count. I was spoiled and grown used to Levi pushing me on the swing, surprised he kept doing it ever since that first day. I had wanted to do something meaningful on the last day of the year, but I couldn't think of anything. Nothing felt right and I was having a hard time not getting caught up in how sad it all was to me. I didn't want this year to end, but time could keep moving forward regardless. On the last day of school the class watched a movie. Everyone was eager to go home when it was over, but like usual I stayed behind.

I thanked Levi for everything he had done for me during the year and wished him luck next year. No matter who was in his class, at least most of them were bound to like him. He was a great teacher and a great friend. Despite knowing I would see him around even if I wasn't in his class, it was still the hardest goodbye I had to say. I had no idea that at the end of next year I would say goodbye again, but for a very long time. That goodbye would be the hardest one that I had ever done.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 2- Levi**

I’d certainly dug myself into a hole. Hanji was avoiding me now since I’d completely forgotten about her and I was trying to avoid Eren even though it was impossible. Every time I looked at him my eyes were on his lips, it was sick. I was a fucking pervert and that’s what he wanted. Eren wanted me to want him and hell, I did. Ever since Friday morning he was all I could think about. The following week had gone by so slowly and I was so eager to get out of there on Friday—deciding I would take Titan to my lake house for the weekend. 

When I got home and started packing though, I couldn’t shake the thoughts of Eren from my mind and it had been that way all week. Maybe I just needed to get him out of my system and then I could forget. The wiser side of me knew that was all bullshit, but that didn’t stop me from opening my laptop and shooting him an email. I told him to call me and left my number and decided if he hadn’t called in half an hour, it wasn’t meant to be. 

Only five minutes passed before my phone started ringing and I stared at the unprogrammed number, knowing it was him. There was no getting out of it now. Or maybe there was. 

“Hello?” I answered carefully, just in case it wasn’t him. 

_ “Levi senpai, did you miss me already?” _

I rolled my eyes and thought this was probably the most idiotic idea I’d ever had, but the majority of me just didn’t care. “Maybe.” I grumbled just to see how he would react. 

_ “Oh . . . r-really?” _ He stuttered and then cleared his throat.  _ “It’s okay to admit it . . . I might have missed you too.” _

I should hang up. Really, I should pretend this idea never crossed my mind. But… “What are you doing this weekend?”

_ “Nothing.” _ He responded, sounding nonchalant though a tad higher in pitch.

“Then pack a bag for the weekend and come over to my place. I’ll text you the address.” I said quietly, listening intently for his response. 

It was quiet for a few moments until he spoke.  _ “You . . . you’re serious?” _

Was I? Yes. “If you don’t want to come all you need to do is say so.” I muttered, thinking it was probably best if he did turn me down. 

_ “No way, I’m coming.” _ He said and then added,  _ “I just . . . wanted to make sure you meant it.” _

As if I would go through the trouble of emailing him and this phone conversation if I didn’t mean it. “I’ll text you.” I said and hung up the phone before I could change my mind. I needed this. I definitely needed to get this out of my system. 

I texted Eren my address and started loading my car with everything I had to take with me. My clothes and Titan’s things were all I needed since I kept the lake house stocked at all times. We would have to stop by a grocery store on the way and get a few things but nothing much. 

Titan seemed excited about going somewhere and I felt like he’d grown a lot in the week I’d had him. He was a mixed breed but it wasn’t clear what breeds he consisted of, but I was certain he would grow to be a large dog. Not that that bothered me, I was excited to see him grow up big and strong. 

About forty five minutes after I texted him, Eren pulled up into my driveway. I was outside, examining my rose bushes when he arrived but turned to watch him park beside my car and get out. The look of excitement in his eyes was impossible to miss and I was actually glad I was doing this. Who else would really be this excited over spending some time with me. 

“You can put your bag in the trunk.” I told him, opening it and waiting as he came bounding over with his bag. He put it inside and I closed the trunk. “Come on, I just have to lock up the house.”

Eren followed me inside my home and Titan came rushing over, pouncing on both of our legs. I glared at the pup for misbehaving just because we had a guest, but didn’t chide him further than that as I went to make sure all the lights were off and then returned to the door. I picked Titan up and we stepped outside. Eren waited while I locked the door and then I led the way to my car. While Eren wasted no time in getting in the passenger seat, I put Titan in the back and buckled him up before walking around to get behind the wheel. 

My lake house was only an hour away but it would take a little longer considering we had to stop by the grocery store on the way. There was a silence between us that wasn’t particularly uncomfortable as we got on the road. Eren hadn’t said anything yet, but I could imagine that he didn’t know what to think about this sudden turn of events. I had been bound and determined to steer clear of him and look at me now…

But this trip didn’t mean anything… I wasn’t going to fuck him. No. I just wanted to see what would happen if I spent some time with him. How I would feel about it… how he would react to it. We needed this. I definitely did. He was quiet and I wondered what was on his mind, or if he was regretting coming along with me. 

“Titan and I decided to go to the lake for the weekend and we agreed it might be nice to have you join us.” I said after a while, hoping to see how he was feeling about this. 

“Yeah?” Eren chuckled. “Adding me into the mix is bound to cause a chemical reaction.”

“Can you stop with the chemistry jokes?” I scoffed. “There will be no such things happening.”

“Oh, sure sure.” He said in fake agreement. “So how long have you had Titan?” He asked, thankfully changing the subject.

“A week now.” I answered, glancing back to check on him. He was just sitting there in his seatbelt like a good pup. “He’s a good boy.” I said then, using my puppy voice without realizing it. 

Eren laughed and turned a little to look back at him. “Only a week yet he’s such a sweetheart. You’re training him yourself, right?”

“Of course I am.” I said quickly. “He’s taken to me well. I made a good choice with him.”

“He’s definitely something, looks like he’ll be huge when he gets older based on how big he is already.” Eren observed. “A grade A guard dog for sure . . . though I have a feeling he’ll be the biggest softy and snuggler around.”

“Yeah that’s already partly true. He always wants to sleep in bed with me.”

Eren cooed at Titan. “So cute, makes me want a dog.” 

“He’s definitely cute. One day and I already loved him. But he’s needy as hell.” I laughed. 

“Oh, I bet!” Eren joined in, turning back around. “He’s got a great home. You’ll be strict and make sure he does what he needs to do, but you’ll give in on the little things. He’ll be spoiled for sure.”

I glanced at Eren thoughtfully. “How can you be so sure?” Titan was my first pet after all… I could be doing everything wrong. 

Eren hummed and crossed his arms. “You and I have a history together . . . but you’ve forgotten about it. I’m sure because I know you, it’s as simple as that.”

“Just because I used to teach you doesn’t mean we have a history together—or that you know me. How can you be so confident?” It had been a long time and he was so young anyway… how did  _ he  _ remember...

He was quiet for awhile before he spoke again. “Does that mean you remember then?” He asked, but didn’t wait for a response. “I see . . . but you don’t remember everything. I can’t give you all the answers, Levi senpai. Yes it’s been a long time, but some things never change. Maybe this trip will be educational after all.”

“I remember you used to wear glasses. And you were quiet. And cute.” 

“Contacts.” He explained shortly. “I came out of my shell, but I’m still cute. Right?”

Maybe he was. But he was so hard to deal with that his cuteness was often forgotten. “I’m not sure.” I mumbled, feeling as if cute wasn’t the right word. He was much more than cute now. “But I will say that you still have pretty eyes.”

Eren didn’t respond and I glanced over at him again, his gaze out the window as his ears turned red.

“You’re hiding now? I thought you’d like a compliment.” And he sure hadn’t seemed shy since he’d gotten older. No, far from it. 

“I-I’m not hiding.” He insisted and then changed the topic again. “How much further until we get there?”

So he wasn’t always so confident… “We should be there in an hour. But we have to stop and do some shopping on the way. Maybe a little less than an hour. Why… are you eager to get out of the car?” He wasn’t escaping me. I had him for the entire weekend. 

“I’m eager to get out of the friend zone.” He corrected. 

I laughed. “You’re not in the friend zone, kid.” Not even close. 

“Then what zone am I in?” He asked curiously, looking back at me again.

I wasn’t expecting that question. “Definitely the troublesome student zone.” I stated plainly. I couldn’t consider him my friend, even if I was taking him away for the weekend. I knew I was wrong for this… but I blamed him more than myself. “But who knows… maybe you can make it to the friend zone.”

“I’d rather skip that zone and move onto the next one.” He huffed and then added, “It’s possible, we both know I’m good at excelling.”

Cocky brat. “There is no other zone.” I muttered. “Besides, I’m too old for you anyway.”

Eren scoffed. “If that’s all you got to stop me, it’s smooth sailing from here on out. Want me to blow your sail again?”

I almost lost control of the wheel. Where did he come up with these things? “Are you kidding? That’s never gonna happen. Ever.” But shit... He was good at it. I couldn’t admit to that though. 

“Say what you want, but the storm is coming.” He warned with a smirk.

Fucking hell. “Why do you even want me anyway?” He could have anybody he wanted, I was sure. So why?

“I’m not telling you.”

“And why the hell not?”

Eren clicked his tongue. “I told you, I can’t give you all the answers.”

That was disappointing, but I decided to drop it for now and turn the radio on. The rest of the drive was completed in silence though we did talk about what foods we wanted when we stopped at the store. I bought a lot more food than necessary and it didn’t take us but another fifteen minutes to make it to the lake house. 

The two story cabin was right on the lake. I had my own boat and jet ski, but they were rarely used besides during the summer. It was secluded and well maintained. I cleaned thoroughly every time I came and would definitely need to dust considering it had been over a month since my last visit. The lawn was kept up by a company I paid so that was something I never had to worry about. 

We got out of the car and gathered our bags and the grocery bags as well. Titan jumped out of the car as soon as I’d unbuckled him and was now running around happily. Eren and I carried everything inside and into the kitchen. 

“Help me put these groceries away and I’ll show you to a room.” I said as I began pulling things out of the bags. 

“Can you show me to your room?” He asked and pitched in to help.

“Troublesome student zone. Remember?” I teased as I started putting things into the refrigerator. 

Eren chuckled, placing items in the cabinet. “I know. And I’m trying to advance.”

“Well you won’t get very far.” I muttered, even though I didn’t trust my own words. “Especially since you’re keeping secrets.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault you forgot.” He shrugged. “That’s what you get.” 

“Well the same goes for you, brat.” I scoffed. “That’s why you’ll be stuck in your own lane. Don’t even think about mine.”

Eren closed the cabinet and leaned back on the counter, grinning as he slowly looked me up and down. “I own your lane, Levi senpai.”

“Where the hell do you get that idea?” I scowled at him and went about gathering all the empty bags. 

He giggled, as if he knew some secret I didn’t. “What should we make for lunch?” He asked and ignored my question.

“Not a damn thing until you stop being so secretive. You have things to say… so say them.” I was done beating around the bush. 

“Not happening.” He said stubbornly. 

I tossed the bags in the trash and walked over to him, not happy about the fact that he’d outgrown me. “Tell me.” 

“No.”

“Now see… you’ve changed so much. You would have never denied me when you were younger. Such a shame.” I sighed and grabbed my bags off of the floor. “I don’t know why I even bothered.”

Eren’s face went blank and he stuffed his bags into a single one before responding. “It was a shame . . . I think I’ll go find that room.” He said quietly and wandered off.

I went upstairs to my own room, frustrated that he had to be this way. We weren’t getting far at all and I was only becoming more certain that bringing him along was a horrible idea. I wanted to lay on my bed and mull over these thoughts, but I had to check on Titan and dust the house from top to bottom. That would definitely keep me busy. 

So I went downstairs, tied my apron around my waist, got on my gloves and went to work. Nobody cleaned as thoroughly as me. I worked up a sweat in little to no time and had only just finished scrubbing the floor when Titan came barreling in, soaking wet and slinging dog smelling water everywhere. 

“No!” I cried as he tackled me onto my back, soaking me and licking me all over. And I was so close to finishing the floor. Now I was disgusting and I’d have to start all over. “Titan no!” I groaned and pushed him off of me as I sat up. “Damn it.”

Titan just stared at me with his big green puppy eyes, panting excitedly. I was so upset that he’d done this to me and now both of us needed a bath and the floor had to be cleaned again. It seemed like today just wasn’t my day. 

“Let’s go outside and get you cleaned up.” I sighed and got to my feet, leading him outside. 

It was nice and warm even though it wouldn’t be long before sunset. I stripped off the apron and my soaked shirt and started washing Titan. I couldn’t have a dirty dog. 

“You’re in big trouble now, mister. You’re going inside and you’re going to stay there.” I was telling him as I scrubbed his back. “You don't want to stink, do you?”

Titan barked in response as if he would be happy to stink and I grimaced. It took me several minutes to finish washing him. After he shook most of the water off of himself, I toweled him as dry as possible and then picked up my discarded shirt and apron. 

I was surprised when I walked back inside and the floor had been cleaned. Eren was there in the kitchen, making lunch. He only glanced at me briefly before returning to what he was cooking and I kept my mouth shut as I hurried upstairs, eager for a shower. I certainly felt much better once I was clean and I dressed in a pair of lounging shorts and a T-shirt. Then I went downstairs to see if Eren needed any help. 

He’d finished making lunch and was sitting at the table, another plate on the table across from him. Accepting the invitation, I sat down and started eating. It was nice to know that he could clean and cook, obviously capable of taking care of himself. I had a few bites before deciding it was best if I apologized. 

“Look kid, I’m sorry for earlier… you’re my student and I have to keep reminding myself of that. So I won’t ask again. It… doesn’t matter anyway.” The words felt like lies but I felt that I had to say them. I needed to let go of this—whatever  _ this _ was. I didn’t need to know about the past or what he actually felt. I just needed to let go. “Let’s just forget about it and enjoy the weekend so we can get back to our lives.”

Eren sighed and mumbled under his breath, “You still don’t get it.” He shook his head after that though gave me a small smile. “Alright, let’s enjoy the weekend.”

I didn’t know what I was supposed to be getting but it didn’t matter. “Thanks for cooking.” I told him instead of giving him nothing but silence, but this wasn’t going as I expected it to. I realized now that I probably did want something to happen between us. However, it couldn’t. 

After our late lunch or rather, early dinner we went into the living room and I turned on a movie. When Eren sat on the couch, I sat on the other end and was glad when Titan came over and jumped on my lap. I stared down at him as I rubbed his head, not even watching the movie. A few minutes later and I noticed that Eren had moved closer to me, but I ignored the move and continued to focus on Titan who was now drifting off to sleep. Eren kept coming closer as the minutes ticked by until he was pressed against my side. 

I glanced over at him. “Why are you getting so close?” I asked quietly. 

“Because I want to cuddle.” He said, looking pleased with himself.

_ Cuddle? _ “Oh no, I don’t cuddle. Except with Titan.” I said as I gestured to my lap pup. 

“Well that’s hardly fair.” He pouted.

And there was the cute side. “Didn’t we agree to enjoy the weekend?” I grumbled, having decided not to have any closeness between us. And yet here we were...

“That’s what I’m doing.” He insisted and shimmied closer still. “It’s nice, don’t you think? Lots of thermal energy.”

“Hm.” I closed my eyes and rested my head on the back of the couch, not wanting to argue about it. Seeing Titan fall asleep had made me drowsy as well. 

Eren didn’t say anything else, but I felt his head lay on my shoulder. It was quiet and I was comfortable so it didn’t surprise me when I soon drifted off to sleep. 

I woke up in the same position but instead of my hand laying on Titan, it was laying on Eren’s head that was now resting in my lap. Sneaky brat. Instead of pulling my hand away, I ran my fingers through his soft brown locks and looked to the tv. A different movie was playing. Titan was now laying on the floor, which I was fairly certain had a lot to do with Eren. 

The way he sighed at my touch told me he was awake, but I said nothing. I only played with his hair because I liked the feel of it and it was one part of him that hadn’t changed. The rest of him had changed so much since he was a kid… not only in how much he’d grown, but in the way he acted too. Eren used to be so timid most of the time but he wasn’t anymore. I wondered what he’d experienced throughout middle and high school that caused the dramatic change in his demeanor. 

Eren had certainly been a precious student to me when I taught him in my first and second years of teaching. He was so bright even then, always eager to learn and so well in class. He was adorable and really sweet, and I had a soft spot for him that didn’t exist for any of my other students. I knew he thought a lot of me back then and had even grown to have a silly crush on me. Things like that happened with kids, it was completely natural. But now it seemed that even though he’d been so young, he really did like me more than I first thought. 

It was easy to remember me smiling and brushing him off back then. I never took him seriously. So many things he’d said to me had been forgotten over the years. I’d taught a lot of kids, young and old. So many were forgotten completely, but then there was Eren and I did remember him. Because he was a special student. I supposed the same could be said for him now. 

I wanted to know more about him. If he didn’t want to talk about  _ our  _ past, I would let it go and focus on his past and who he was now. Because as much as I didn’t want to be, I was interested in him and he was even more interested in me it seemed. He had to give me some answers. 

“Tell me kid, how many guys have you been with?” I asked quietly as I played with his hair. 

Eren looked up at me in shock. “What the—where did  _ that _ come from?”

I pulled my hand away from his hair and sighed. “Tell me.”

“How many guys have you been with?” He countered, staring me down.

I glared at him then. “I believe I fucking asked you first.”

“Well . . .” He mumbled and looked back at the tv. “A few.”

“Literally?” I questioned, wanting an exact answer. 

“Yeah, just three . . . what about you?” He asked, turning the question back around.

“No. You’re lying.” I scoffed. “Be honest.”  _ Like you used to be.  _

He sat up and crossed his arms. “What makes you think I’m lying?”

“Because you looked away to say it. And it just doesn’t feel right.” He was lying. I knew he was. 

Eren huffed, but didn’t deny it. “It’s not going to change anything so don’t expect it to . . . . . I’ve never been with anyone.” He admitted.

He couldn’t be in his early twenties and still a virgin. No. “So then how many girls?”

“Levi senpai, I’m gay.”

_ What the fuck.  _ I got off the couch, palming my face. “You can’t be fucking serious.” I hissed, near panicking because I  _ knew  _ he wasn’t lying. 

“Yes I’m fucking serious, don’t make such a big deal out of it.” He said hotly. “Maybe I’m inexperienced, but I’m not ignorant. Trust me, I know exactly what I’m doing.”

I took a deep breath to calm myself down but it didn’t help at all. “You don’t know anything.” I groaned. “Nothing. You know absolutely nothing.”

“This is exactly why I lied.” He sighed and leaned back on the couch. “Say what you want, but like I just told you, it doesn't change anything. In fact, it shows you how dedicated I am. I  _ chose _ not to be with anyone.”

“Why?” I asked, outraged. But I wasn’t sure if I wanted to hear his reason. 

Eren’s irritation melted away and his eyes softened. “Because I didn’t want anyone else. All I want is you . . . though I’ll probably end up scaring you off.”

This was unbelievable. What had I done to this kid to make him so crazy? How could I even consider fucking around with him after learning this. I couldn’t. I had to keep my distance. Bringing him here was a mistake. 

“You haven’t seen me in ten years. You could have never seen me again. You can’t possibly say that you haven’t forgotten me after all this time.”

“I didn’t expect to see you at school, but I always planned to find you after college.” He said, determination shining through. “I know how crazy this sounds, how insane I must look to you . . . but I couldn’t forget you. I knew I had a crush on you back then, but I didn’t really know what liking someone meant. However as I grew, so did my feelings. I was able to understand them more. I’ve had years to think about everything and I have thought this through. Don’t assume you can brush me off this time.” 

He was definitely insane. “And what is it that you expect from me?” He didn’t know me… he didn’t know anything. 

“I expect you to fight me every step of the way.” He said honestly. “But what I want is a chance.”

I looked at him in disbelief and shook my head. “It can never happen. I’m too old for you. I’ve done shit you can’t even imagine. You’re a goddamn virgin. I couldn’t even tell you how many people I’ve been with. And you think… you fucking think that I could be with someone like you?”

“Maybe I’m not the only one who has changed.” Eren said and stared at the coffee table. “Since when did you start judging people? Perhaps you always did to a degree, but I thought at least you wouldn’t do that to me. Are you saying it’s all about sex? Is that all a relationship is to you? You’re not that shallow and neither am I.”

I took a seat on the other couch, holding my head in my hands. He couldn’t understand and I felt like I was going insane too. “I’m not judging you, Eren. I’m judging myself. Because I am just  _ that  _ shallow. You don’t know me. Why do you think I’ve been with so many people? Not because I want them to love me. A quick fuck and I’m done. I’ve never once been in a relationship with anyone.”

“Okay then. None of that is changing my mind.” He said stubbornly. “I came here because I want to get to know you . . . so let me. I know I’m pushing you, but I have to. Otherwise I won’t stand a chance and before I know it you’ll be gone again.”

“And if I told you that the only chance you had was to catch me in a weak moment where I’d take advantage of you and never want anything else… would you leave?” I asked as I stared at the floor. 

Eren clicked his tongue in frustration. “I’m not going anywhere until I’ve given this everything I’ve got. Will I get hurt in the end? I don’t know, but I don’t want to regret standing by and doing nothing. I can’t just accept things as the way they are without trying to do anything about it. If I don’t fight for it . . . then I’m just the same as I was in the past.”

I just continued to stare at the floor, completely at a loss.  _ This is the same kid that sucked me off in my classroom?  _ How could he be a virgin and yet do such a thing? Why would he… and he was so good at it too. When I called him out on his lie, I didn’t think it was because he hadn’t been with three people. I thought it had been more than that. So the shock at realizing he could be so completely innocent and yet still conduct such an act… I wasn’t sure if I’d ever understand. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 2.5- Eren**

It wasn’t until fifth grade that I realized I had a crush on Levi. I respected him and was grateful to call him my friend, but my feelings had changed. No, that wasn’t right. They hadn’t changed, they had grown. Summer had been long and lonely for me. The house was always quiet and empty. My dad was there most of the time, but he was locked away in the basement. 

I understood that his work was important and that he didn’t have time to play with me. I was proud of his work even if it took up most of his time. He was a chemist for the government, an outstanding scientist that had the rank and the equipment to work from home. I knew he went to the lab whenever I was at school, but he always made it a point to be home with me rather than leaving me with a babysitter.

It might have meant I was alone most of the time, but at least he was there if I needed him. All I had to do was press the button on the basement door and he would come upstairs. I did that when it was time to eat since he forgot all the time, but he never forgot to make me lunch to take to school. He taught me how to do a lot of things and for the most part I didn’t need to bother him. I thought that the less I bothered him then the sooner he could get finished. 

I was used to amusing myself and kept quiet so I wouldn’t distract him. Sometimes I would go in his study and read the books he had, but there were a lot of words I didn’t understand. I liked to watch movies in my room and I had some books of my own. I was even allowed to ride my bike to the park as long as I asked dad first. It was hard to find a time when there wasn’t a lot of people there so I could swing, but it worked out every now and again.

Some days I went to the library to study and make sure my brain didn’t get rusty. Other days I would ride around the neighborhood and enjoy the sun. Most days I decided to stay inside because I still had to get permission whenever I went out, dad needed to know where I was and trusted me to stay true to my word. My birthday came and that was the best day out of summer break, dad had spent the whole day with me and we went to the fair. I wished he would do things like that more often, but I knew his work was important. 

I took what I could get and stayed out of his way in order not to make him fall behind in his duties. It seemed like he had a lot of fun with his work, he went on and on about it when we ate together. He explained things to me as best as he could and I had to admit I found it interesting. Science had always been one of my favorite classes and I couldn’t help thinking it had something to do with my dad. 

I couldn’t wait for summer to be over and when it finally was, the first day of school was filled with mixed emotions. I was excited and nervous at the same time, too anxious to look at the teacher's name next to my home room on my schedule. I wished every night that I would get Levi again and hoped that it would pay off. I rode my bike there and was early, not a lot of students were around. 

The closer I went down the hall the more unsettled I got and feared the worst. There was no way I would get the same teacher for two years in a row even if he switched to fifth grade. I had used up all my luck last year, meeting him in the first place was enough. I stood outside my home room door and forced myself to look through the glass to peek inside. I frowned at seeing a woman writing her name on the board, a Mrs. Rol. 

That was it . . . I wouldn’t be in Levi’s class. I stared down at my shoes and couldn’t bring myself to open the door and take my seat. Sometimes hoping just wasn’t enough. 

“Eren?”

I looked around at the familiar voice, turning to my right to find who called me. “Levi senpai!”

He smiled softly at me and waved me over. “Why are you peeking in on other classes?”

“That’s my class.” I said sadly as I padded over to him. At least he was close by, just one room down from mine.

He chuckled lightly and ruffled my hair as soon as I was in front of him. “Sorry but you’re stuck with me again this year.”

I blinked up at him in confusion and then looked at his room number. My lips formed an ‘o’ shape as I realized my mistake. “Room 202!” I cheered excitedly, the one from before being 201. I was one room off.

“Well I’m glad you’re not disappointed.” He told me happily. “You’ve grown over the summer… did you have a lot of fun?”

“It was okay.” I grinned widely. “I’m excited I got you again, you’re my favorite teacher.” I said matter of factly.

“And you’re my favorite student so I’d say we’re quite a pair.” He mused as he ushered me into the classroom. “You can take a look around and sit wherever you like.”

I nodded and took in the new classroom. It was a little bigger than the one from last year and Levi’s desk was in the corner instead of the middle. I decided to take a chance, make this year count more than the last and sit up front. I took the seat to the far left, the one closest to Levi’s desk. I was excited for the year to begin and learn more. I liked to learn and Levi always made it fun, I was sure this year's class would find that out. 

The first week of school went differently than in the past and aside from a few students, no one tried Levi. In fact, it seemed like most of them wanted to get on his good side. I didn’t recognize anyone and wondered if that meant I would have a better chance of making friends. I hadn’t talked to anyone yet, but I was gathering my courage. Being in Levi’s class just made me believe that this time it would be possible and I wanted to try.

I went for it the second week during playtime. A small group of boys were talking while one held a soccer ball, it looked like they were picking teams. I timidly approached them and told myself to be brave when I caught their attention.

“H-hello.” I greeted, eyes flickering from my shoes to their faces. “Can I play?”

The one with the ball shrugged. “Yeah, sure. You can be on my team, I’m the captain.”

I nodded, doing my best not to let my nerves get the better of me. So far so good. Once the teams were decided, we got in position to start. I hadn’t played soccer before, but I’d seen other kids play it. I had a good idea what to do. Things went pretty well in the beginning, I was good at passing and could run faster than the other boys. However, once I tried shooting things changed. It wasn’t hard to tell that the captain of my team was getting frustrated and I stopped shooting in hopes he would stop giving me dirty looks.

That only ended up back firing since I would make it close to the goal first and passed it backwards to avoid shooting. Our team was losing and the captain was not happy, going as far as to stop the game entirely to tell me as much. The other guys stayed quiet as if they were afraid to say a word and even under the circumstances, it didn’t go beyond my notice. I was still as observant as ever and I could see that this boy was the leader of the group.

“I can’t play with you anymore, you seriously suck.” The boy said and I didn’t have it in me to argue. It wasn’t fair of him to say that and I was doing a good job for my first time, wasn’t I?

It made me mad, but I wasn’t sure what to do about it.

“Didn’t you hear me?” The boy said heatedly. “I don’t want to play with you, none of us do. Get lost, four eyes.”

That got some laughs out of the others and my heart pounded in my ears. I went back inside before he could say anymore mean things and ended up at my desk, the classroom empty. I laid my arms on the flat surface and put my head down, hiding my face. Maybe things would have gone differently if I had talked to some of the girls instead. I didn’t understand why things kept turning out this way for me, but it was hard. It was hard to be by myself all the time and get knocked down when I reached out. 

I wasn’t a bad person or anything, so how come no one wanted to be my friend? The thought had my eyes stinging and I was tempted to let it happen. I felt like crying multiple times in the past, but not once could I remember letting the tears fall. I felt like if I did then I was accepting whatever had made me sad. I felt like I was giving into it and letting it win. I wanted to be strong in that regard at least though I was reaching my limits. It was crazy, I was eleven now and still hadn’t learned how to make friends. The only friend I had was Levi and he was great, but couldn’t come over to my house to play. He was an adult with adult friends to do things with.

I was just a powerless kid.

“Eren? What are you doing in here?” Levi asked in wonder, having entered the classroom suddenly. He came over to my desk as I looked up at him, trying to keep a straight face but he frowned when he got a good look at me. “What’s wrong?”

I shook my head and wiped the tears away before they could fall. “I’m just . . . it’s no good, Levi senpai.”

“What’s no good?” He asked as he knelt down in front of my desk and laid his arms crossed on it just as I had done. “I know you’re not talking about yourself.”

“But . . . no one likes me . . . and I don’t know why.” I told him honestly.

“Well,” He sighed. “They’re probably jealous of you.”

My brow furrowed at his words. “Jealous? Of me?” 

He nodded and smiled sweetly at me. “Yeah. It makes sense with you being so smart and cute. Even I’m a little jealous.”

My cheeks heated up and I failed to fight back a smile. “No way.”

“Yes way.” He grinned. “You’re awesome and one day you’ll have a lot of friends. They’ll get tired of being jealous and want to be close to you. Like me.”

My smile widened and just like that I felt better. If Levi believed it then I would too, he was really smart too and hadn’t been wrong yet. I didn’t walk up to any of my classmates again, but I did go to the swing. There were other kids there and I was able to coach myself through it to get on a swing. I was admittingly proud and so was Levi, a lot of the time he would come to push me. The same chart ranking from last year was brought back and I was working on my participation as well as my grades. I was determined to be Levi’s top student again, no one was going to score higher than me.

Working in groups got easier as the first months passed and I was able to even lead some of them. Levi said it was a matter of time before I made friends and while I still sat alone at lunch, some of my classmates did talk to me when they had a question about our assignments. I was happy to help and it felt good to be depended on, but I wasn’t going to do their work for them. Levi had made it a point to tell me not to let them copy my work or for me to simply tell them the answers. He really looked out for me and sometimes I even ditched the swing to sit and talk with him in class during playtime. 

There was another change in the class dynamic though. The boy who had kicked me out of the soccer game, Jean, was slowly getting more kids to join his little group. He was bossy and could be mean, but for some reason the others listened to him. I suspected it was because they didn’t want to become his next target. He was in fact turning into a bully and forcing his way every time Levi’s back was turned. It seemed like his goal was to have the whole class scared of him and do what he said. I didn’t like him at all, he made things more difficult than they had to be. 

I stayed out of his way for the most part since I didn’t want anything to do with him. However, it was only a matter of time before he got on my case again. I was surprised when it finally did happen and he walked up to me with a smile.

“Hey there, Eren.” He greeted and put his arm over my shoulder.

I shrugged it off, eyes scanning the playground for the nearest adult. Jean frowned and narrowed his gaze, but he was quick to put the fake smile back.

“Don’t be like that, I just want to be friends. How about we sit next to each other in class?” He asked and I wasn’t buying his act for a second. 

I didn’t know if this was a roundabout way of intimidating me, but I wasn’t going to give into him. I was growing as a person . . . and I wouldn’t be a pushover anymore. At least that was the plan, but I wasn’t sure how that would go with Jean hanging around me. I didn’t respond to him and he took that as my agreement. The next thing I knew he swapped seats to be next to me and I was tempted to ask Levi to make him move back. He made me uncomfortable and kept talking to me every chance he got. I was unsure what he wanted, but I wished he would just ask and go away. 

His reason became clear once he started trying to copy my homework. I refused to show it to him day after day and finally he realized I wouldn’t give into him. Things took a turn for the worst after that and he stopped pretending to be nice. He would make fun of me at every opportunity, calling me four eyes in front of everyone. It was obvious I had become his new target and the people that had come up to me before with questions kept their distance. It reminded me of that time with Sasha, making me wonder why I was such easy prey. Was it because I made it that way? Because I didn’t fight back?

Not once did I go to Levi and tell him what was going on. I didn’t want him to think I wasn’t trying, that I hadn’t grown at all since last year and still got picked on. I wanted to be strong and handle it on my own. Jean remained in the desk next to mine and at first I thought it was to torment me better. I learned the truth when one of our tests came around. I was too focused on my own work, wanting to get as many answers right as I could. I hadn’t noticed Jean sneaking peeks at what I wrote and he would have gotten away with it if he hadn’t forgotten who our teacher was. Levi never missed things like that, he had the sharpest eyes around.

It was after the test was over that he asked both Jean and I to stay behind. The rest of the class got their things and left to go home, but the two of us made our way to Levi’s desk. 

”So… let’s talk about these test results.” He said as he rolled his seat back and crossed his legs. “Who wants to go first?”

I didn’t know what was going on, but I decided to speak up. “Did I not do well?” I asked even though I had been sure my answers were correct.

Levi’s eyes narrowed slightly and moved from me to Jean. “Jean?” He spoke his name questioningly and he didn’t look happy. 

“Eren hangs out with me all the time . . . we study together.” He lied and I looked at him in confusion. “It makes sense if our scores were close.”

“Cheating will not be tolerated in this class. I am beyond disappointed that you would even attempt it. In the morning, you will retake the test, and you will move back to your old seat. Do you understand?”

Jean nodded quickly and dropped his gaze to the floor. I couldn’t blame him, Levi could be scary when he wanted to be. His tone alone was more than enough to set someone straight. We were dismissed and I lingered behind, waiting until Jean was gone before I went up to Levi. 

“Levi senpai.”

“What is it?” He asked, voice much softer than it was just a moment before. 

I put my hand on top of his, expression concerned. “Are you okay?” I knew he cared a lot about all his students and he wanted everyone to do well. He worked hard to show us the right way, it was obvious to me that what Jean did really hurt his feelings.

He hesitated for a second before managing a smile. “I’m fine. I must have worried you… I was sure you’d noticed that Jean was copying your work.”

“I was too focused.” I admitted. “I wanted to get every answer right.”

“You did well. You always do. I’m not upset that you didn’t notice, that’s not your fault. I’m just disappointed in Jean.”

I hummed in understanding. “I think . . . I think you’ll get through to him before the year is over. I have faith in you, Levi senpai.”

He laughed then. “Thank you. That makes me happy. I’ll certainly do my best.” 

I gave him a wide smile, glad I could help. 

Jean moved back to his original seat and left me alone after that. I was able to relax without him breathing down my neck, but the peace only lasted for a few weeks. I was shocked to come to class and find a different teacher in the room. She told us that Levi was sick and would be out for the next couple of days. It wasn’t a long time, but I was still worried. It never occured to be that someone like Levi could get sick. I hoped and wished as much as I could that he wasn’t in any pain. I missed him a lot, but I was given other things to worry about. Jean came at me full force now that Levi was out of the way and his bullying started to get physical. 

He went back to calling me names and saying whatever mean things he could think of, adding shoves in as much as he could. It made me upset, but I decided to ignore him rather than reacting. That just made him mad and he started messing with my stuff too. He threw my backpack on the ground, stomped on my lunch and even ripped up my homework. The other kids would laugh and his loud cackling stood out most of all. On the last day we had the substitute teacher, he cornered me outside before I could get to my bike and ride it home. He pushed me against the wall and began pulling things out of my backpack.

“Stupid four eyes, don’t even think about getting comfortable when Mr. Ackerman comes back tomorrow.” Jean warned, pausing as he found my agenda. He flipped to a random page and found a note Levi had left. “Ew, you’re such a teacher’s pet. No one likes a know it all, you know. That’s why you don’t have any friends.” He said and ripped the page out.

My eyes widened as he started ripping it up and I lunged forward to try to take it from him. “Stop it!”

Jean swiped my glasses and shoved me back again. “Hahaha, look at you! You can’t do anything!” He taunted as I squinted at him, gasping when he dropped my glasses on the ground.

The sound of broken glass echoed in my ears when he stepped on them and suddenly my face was on fire. I was so angry at him, more than I had ever been at anyone. He just did whatever he wanted and went as far as to break my glasses. On top of that he had destroyed the note Levi had written for me to tell my dad how well I was doing in his class. Jean was a jerk and I was tired of him, I was done ignoring him. My body shook as he laughed and I took a moment to think,  _ what would Levi senpai do? _

I couldn’t see that well, but I could make out what I needed to. I went up to Jean and swung as hard as I could, hitting him right in the face. He fell on his butt and I could hear him crying, but I didn’t care.

“Mess with me again and see what happens! I dare you!” I yelled, fed up with his harassment. He pushed and pushed and  _ pushed _ me and now he got what he deserved. 

Jean scurried to his feet and ran away while I tried to calm my breathing. An outburst like that wasn’t like me yet somehow it was. I didn’t think about it too much though, I had a mess to clean up. It was hard to see, but I picked up all my things and put them back into my backpack. Then I tried to get every shard of glass because I didn’t want anyone to hurt themselves on it. I cut my hands a few times, but I got what I could. I had to walk my bike home, broken glasses in hand. I was able to make it home alright even if it took me longer than usual. 

I had a spare pair in my room and I put bandaids on my hands. However, I didn’t feel any better. I wasn’t sure how to tell dad and I was worried what was going to happen if Jean told on me. Fighting wasn’t allowed and though I didn’t regret it, I had punched him pretty hard. I was probably going to get in trouble and it made me not want to go to school the next day. But I had to go. Levi would be there and I had to see him for myself, I had to see that he was better. My heart was pounding the whole way to school and I was just as early as ever.

It was a little scary walking to the classroom because I felt like a teacher could pull me to the principal's office at any moment. The halls were fairly empty though and so was the classroom. I spotted Levi’s things on his desk, letting me know he was here. I put my backpack next to my seat and wondered what I should do. What if Levi found out and was disappointed in me? I didn’t know for sure if he would hit someone if he was in my position, but it had felt right. The last thing I wasn’t to do was make him upset with me.

After a couple minutes, he came into the classroom with a cup raised to his lips. I thought it was probably coffee, he drank it almost every morning. He pulled the cup down and smiled when he saw me then he walked to his desk, set the cup down and came over to me. 

“You got new glasses?” He asked as he examined my face thoughtfully. They weren’t  _ that  _ different so I didn’t expect him to notice. But he never missed anything. “I figured you were really good while I was out, so I got you a little something.” He told me before I could respond and pulled a card out of his pocket. “It’s a gift card to the hamburger place right down the street. You like them, right?”

I nodded, but didn’t take it from him. I didn’t feel like I deserved it.

He tilted his head as he observed me for a moment. “You don’t want it?” He asked, frowning slightly. 

“I want it.” I said quickly and then added, “But . . . I wasn’t good.”

Levi’s eyes widened at that and he looked around for a few seconds as he pondered my words then he laughed. “Stop messing with me.”

It seemed that he hadn’t found out yet . . . and I had to tell him. “Levi senpai.” I said and paused. “I . . . I punched Jean yesterday . . .”

“What?” He blinked at me, stunned. But his brows raised once he noticed how honest I was being. “You did… that’s unexpected. He must have really pushed you, huh?”

I was taken aback by the fact that he took my side. He didn’t assume I was in the wrong, he thought of why I would do something like that. Once again I was reminded that Levi wasn’t like most adults.

“He ripped up the note you wrote in my agenda and he broke my glasses too.” I explained, wanting him to know the details. “He thought that just because you were gone he could do whatever he wanted.”

I was even more surprised when he smiled before leaning closer to me, even though the room was empty. “I hope you really let him have it.”

I giggled and whispered, “I did.”

“Good.” He said and put the card in my hand. “With this you can have a lot of burgers. Just not all at once. Okay?”

“Okay.” I smiled and thoughtfully looked at his face. “Are you all better, Levi senpai?”

“Sure am.” He nodded, giving me a big smile. “I just caught that bug that was going around.”

I was glad to hear it and wrapped my arms around him in a hug. “Welcome back!” I cheered happily.

He hummed, hugging me back gently. “Thank you.”

I expected to be pulled out of class at some point during the day, but it never happened. Jean hadn’t come to school and it was as if no one knew anything. I didn’t know what to make of it and thought something would happen when Jean came back, but it didn’t. Jean kept his distance again and I got the feeling he hadn’t told on me. I couldn’t understand why he would do that considering he seemed to hate me. He should have been jumping at the opportunity to get me in trouble. Things got even more confusing when he did come up to talk to me. He was nervously twitching his fingers, gaze flickering from me to the side.

“I’m sorry.” He said and I looked at him as if he was a stranger. “I was really mean to you . . . and I’m sorry about your glasses and . . . and for everything. That’s all I wanted to say.”

He left after that and I couldn’t have responded if I wanted to. It was so unlike Jean, not in a million years would I have expected him to apologize to me. The following weeks were just as surprising. He didn’t force his way into my space, but he was going out of his way to be nice to me. If fact, he was being nicer to the rest of the class and his friends as well. It was crazy how different he was acting. I admittedly didn’t buy it at first, but he stuck with it and it was hard to call his efforts ingenuine. He was trying his best and even I could see that despite how he had treated me. It was a little weird, but I started to get used to his new behavior.

Levi said all Jean needed was someone to stand up to him, causing him to change and stop and think about his actions. It made sense, but I hadn’t thought I would have been the person to do it. However, the surprises just kept on coming. Halfway through the year and Jean was becoming someone I would call a friend. To think that Jean the bully would be the first person my own age I would be friends with, no one could have predicted that. It made me think about one of the lessons Levi taught us, that sometimes people do bad things because they don’t know any better. I wondered if Jean had been like that, if he thought his behavior was okay because no one gave him clear consequences. 

Regardless, I didn’t think it was just me. Levi was changing him too and I noticed them talking after school every now and again. I didn’t know what was said, but they both looked happy so it had to be good. Jean and I still bumped heads from time to time, but it was nothing serious and I stood my ground. Things were finally looking up again and I was getting better at being confident. Though something was happening with Levi. I started feeling funny when I was around him, but in a good way. His smiles made me happier than before and my heart would speed up whenever he ruffled my hair. It only took a few weeks of this before I realized what was going on, it was a big deal in fifth grade. I had a crush on him. 

I liked Levi, I like liked him. It was a different kind of like than the one for a friend, but he was still my friend too. My feelings made things complicated and more often than not he had me blushing. I wasn’t sure what to do about it and I didn’t know what he would think. He was an adult and I was just a kid, but he was so great that I couldn’t help it. Anyone could see that Levi was cool and handsome. He was so kind and gentle, how was I supposed to resist that? While I was trying to figure out what to do, Mrs. Rol from next door started coming over to our classroom during recess. I would come inside to ask Levi to push me on the swing only to find him talking with the other teacher. 

I would go back outside so I wouldn’t disturb them, but seeing them together made me uncomfortable. It was almost like a sharp pain in my chest and I didn’t like the way Mrs. Rol looked at Levi. One day curiosity got the better of me and I stood behind the open door to hear what they were talking about.

“We could always have dinner together.” Mrs. Rol suggested.

Levi was quiet for a few seconds before saying, “I don’t think so.”

“Is this because of our positions?” She asked. “It wouldn’t be a problem . . . and I’m sure you’ve realized my intentions.” I wasn’t sure what Mrs. Rol was talking about, but it sounded as if she liked Levi too.

“Of course I have. That’s why I turned you down. I’m not interested.”

Mrs. Rol was quiet for awhile before she responded. “ . . . If I wasn’t married, would that make a difference?”

“In regards to the respect I have for you, yes. As for my answer, no.” Levi told her plainly. 

“I see.” She said quietly and I shrunk further behind the door when I heard her heels coming closer. 

I peeked around in time to see her go back to her own classroom and I frowned. It felt like . . . like she was trying to take Levi away from me. Did that mean if I didn’t take action then someone else would steal Levi? I didn’t like that at all, imagining someone else being special to him made me feel sick. I knew it was selfish of me, but I wanted him to be with me. I wanted him to know I liked him the most. I came from behind the door and went inside, closing it right after me. Levi looked up at the sound and my pulse quickened when he smiled at me. Was I really about to do this?

Next year I would be going to middle school while he would still be here. If I didn’t do it now then when would I? I walked up to his desk, ears burning with the knowledge of what I was going to say to him. 

“L-levi senpai.” I stuttered, forcing myself to look him in the eyes. This was important and I couldn’t shy away from it.

“Yes, Eren?” He inclined his head as he watched me. 

I took a shaky breath and told myself to be brave. “I . . . I-I . . . I love you!” I said way louder than I meant to, face flaming once I noticed I said the wrong L word.

Levi stared at me in surprise at my confession, but it wasn’t long before he smiled and ruffled my hair as he always did. “Don’t be so flustered. I love you too, you know.”

“Really?” I gasped, not expecting such a straightforward answer.

“Of course. You’re very precious to me. I’m going to miss you after this year.” His smile was so genuine and I knew he meant every word. 

I wasn’t ready to say goodbye and time was moving too quickly. “I’ll miss you too . . .” I whispered quietly.

“Let’s not think about that now though, okay?” He suggested, tone light. 

I nodded and took a hesitant step forward. “Can I have a hug?” I asked, feeling like I should this time.

His answer was wrapping me in his arms and hugging me tightly. “You’re so sweet, Eren.” He smiled as he held me close. 

I grinned and hugged him back as best I could. I couldn’t remember ever being this happy.

However, nothing lasts forever and the last day of school came without mercy. The days had seemed so short and I had focused on the present rather than the future, causing time to sneak up on me. I wasn’t ready to say goodbye and I sat at my desk alone after class, Levi having gone to see the other students out before he came back. I hadn’t been able to look at him all day and I was dreading going to middle school. Sure I would know where he was, but he still wouldn’t be with me and I hated it.

Levi came over to my desk and set a gift bag before me. “I’m glad you didn’t run away like everyone else.” He told me, kneeling down beside me. “I couldn’t give you a gift in front of the other kids… that would have been mean of me.”

“Thank you.” I said even though I didn’t know what was inside. I curiously eyed the bag, knowing that if I looked at Levi I would start tearing up. “What is it?”

“Just a little something. You can open it now if you want, or wait. Whichever you prefer.”

“I want to do it now.” I said. That way he could see my reaction. I reached into the bag and felt around the tissue paper until my fingers brushed against something. I pulled it out to reveal a picture of Levi and I, smiles on both of our faces. “It’s the best.” I sniffled, bottom lip trembling.

“I’m glad you like it. I made one for myself too.” He admitted with a sigh and then reached for my head, but instead of ruffling my hair he only laid his hand there. “Don’t go making sad faces okay. You’re going to have a lot of fun from here on out. You’ll learn a lot and I know you’ll make me proud. Maybe you’ll even take more to science since you’re so good at it.”

I nodded and stared at his shirt. “I’ll come back and show you, I’ll show you how hard I’ve worked.” I promised.

“Oh, well… actually I’ll be leaving here to start teaching in high school instead.”

I hadn’t heard anything about that. “W-what? But where?”

“A couple towns away. But there’s no telling how long I’ll be there. I wish I could stay in this district, then I could teach you again one day. But I guess that’s not meant to be.” He sighed. 

I finally looked up at him and didn’t even care that I was crying. “Levi senpai, you can’t. How am I supposed to find you again? Y-you’re going so far away . . . aren’t we going to get married someday?” That’s what two people who loved each other did.

Levi frowned and studied me silently for the longest time before he said, “You’ve got a lot of growing up to do for now, Eren. I don’t want you thinking about anything other than school. And then by the time you finish college, you’ll find me.”

“That’s a long time.” I whined, but I knew he was right. “Will . . . will you wait for me, Levi senpai?” I pleaded as I tried to wipe my face.

“Don’t worry. Time will fly by. You’re going to be so busy. But I won’t forget about you.”

“You promise?”

He smiled then, his teeth flashing. “I promise.”

Hearing him say it made me feel better, but I still wished things were different. I didn’t want him to go. I didn't want him to, but I couldn’t do anything about it. I held the picture close to my chest for a while before I carefully put it back in the bag. I gazed back at Levi and told myself not to cry again. It would be okay, I would see him again one day.

“Goodbye, Levi senpai.” I said and kissed him on the cheek. “Good luck at your new school. I know they’ll like you.”

“I would wish you luck too, but you’re not going to need it.” He said, giving me a fond look. “I can’t wait to see you all grown up.”

I smiled at the thought. “I’ll be just as big as you and just as smart!”

“Maybe even bigger and smarter.” He laughed and pulled me into a hug. “I’ll be looking forward to it.”

I didn’t hesitate to returned his hug. “Me too.”

That day had been hard for me, but I never forgot it. It was the beginning of so many things, mainly the start of my way back to Levi and the development of my feelings. The road ahead of me would be full of doubt and uncertainty. However, I would grow as a person and find the determination to keep my word. I would find Levi senpai and we would start a new chapter.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 3- Levi**

I had no idea how to deal with Eren, so after everything was out in the open all I could do was go to my room and lay in my bed, willing myself to sleep though hours passed before that ever happened. I’d really dug myself into a hole and didn’t know what I was going to do to get out of it. 

Eren’s crush on me wasn’t natural. He was first and foremost my student and there was no way—as a professional teacher—that I could risk getting involved with him for things to go bad and it wind up affecting his school life. I wasn’t that shallow. 

But then again, after listening to him, I wanted more than ever to give in and let everything else go. I wanted to take everything he had to offer and show him a whole world that he had yet to experience. I was weak. And I wanted to blame him. How much resistance could I have with him basically offering himself to me. Saying he didn’t want anyone else… and nobody else had ever had him. I would be the first. It was sick for me to even consider it… 

I was definitely attracted to Eren. He was very good looking and he was also smart, very smart. He loved science as much as I did and liked me even more than I could imagine. For some reason though, I felt as if I owed him something. So after a lot of thought, I decided that I should be his friend. That way I wouldn’t hurt him and I wouldn’t get myself in trouble. 

When I got out of bed the next morning, I took a shower and then let Titan out while I got breakfast started. With a cup of coffee in my hand, I went out to watch as he ran around for a bit before calling him back inside so he could eat. Once he had his food, I finished cooking and then set my coffee down to go wake up Eren. 

I opened his door, fully expecting him to be in bed but he was awake, fresh out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist as he pulled clothes out of his bag.  _ Damn, should of knocked Levi.  _

“Sorry, I figured you were still sleeping. Breakfast is ready.” I said quickly before closing his door and going back downstairs to the kitchen. 

Sometimes I just didn’t think things through at all. With a sigh, I fixed my plate and took it and my coffee to the table. I couldn’t even think about what I saw in that bedroom. My mind was already made up. Nothing was going to happen. I was just going to be his friend… because he deserved that much. 

I had yet to have a bite of my food by the time he came downstairs and fixed his own plate and coffee before joining me at the table. Determined not to let things be awkward between us, I smiled at him when he sat and glanced at me. I was going to pretend like last night never happened—or that day in my classroom. 

“I thought if you’d like, we could take the boat out for a while. Maybe do some fishing.” I suggested, but that was more of something I would like to do. I had no idea how he felt about fishing or open water. “Or if you’d prefer, there’s a clean trail through the woods and we could take a ride on my atv.”

Eren hummed and took a sip of his coffee. “I haven’t been fishing before so I’d like to try it. Though I haven’t driven an atv either . . .” 

“Well we can do both. But we will do whichever you prefer first.”

“I’d prefer to do you first.” He said and smirked into his mug.

I choked on the air I breathed in at that and took a moment to collect myself. No, he wasn’t going to do this to me. I’d already made up my mind. So instead of lashing out, I smiled at him. 

“But I thought you wanted to get to know me… now you’re wanting to jump straight in my bed?”

“You’re right, I do want to get to know you.” He said and put down his coffee. “But I want to get to know your body as well.” He said and began eating.

I shook my head, not sure if being his friend was going to work out for me. “Why do you keep making things sexual?”  _ And he says he’s not shallow.  _

He swallowed before answering. “For three reasons. The first is to remind you that I’m not a child, I’m an adult. The second is to remind you of my intentions, I’m an all or nothing kind of guy.”

“And the third?”

He grinned at me. “Because it’s fun to mess with you.”

_ Such a fucking kid.  _ “Grow up, would you?” I rolled my eyes and returned to my meal. “And give up while you’re at it.”

“Come on now, Levi senpai. You should know me a little better than that at least.” He said and pointed his fork at me. “Haven't you realized I don’t give up?”

“Well there are certain instances that call for it. Like this one. There’s not a damn thing you could do to make me fuck you. So forget it.”

Eren blinked at me and then chuckled. “For your own sake, don’t try me.”

How the hell was I supposed to be nice and friendly if he was trying me like this? “No. You don’t try me, brat.” I growled and picked up my coffee for a sip.  _ Who the hell does he think he is... _

“Whatever you say, Professor Ackerman.” He said, but I knew this wasn’t the end of it. I could tell by the tone of his voice and it really irked me. 

After breakfast, I washed the dishes and made the decision that we would go fishing first since he’d never made the choice. Once again, I disregarded our conversation and focused on being nice. For now, I would try. But if he kept testing me, I would have to do something about it and I was sure neither of us would like whatever it was I’d end up doing. 

We went outside together with Titan and I gathered everything we needed before we got in the boat. It was a beautiful day, warm but not hot and perfect for fishing. Once I anchored at my favorite spot in the shade, I told Eren about fishing and that I always released each fish I caught. He listened intently and prepared his rod as I did mine. It was calm on the water and fishing had always been relaxing for me, though I usually only indulged during the summer when I had nothing better to do. 

He seemed to enjoy himself and when he reeled in his first catch and his whole face lit up in delight, I couldn’t help but smile. Seeing him happy like that did make me glad. It reminded me of when he was younger and not so trying. But he didn’t want to touch the fish and left that to me. He watched in amazement as I put the fish back in the water and it swam away—all too eager to catch another.

For a couple of hours we fished, catching several each before I got hungry and suggested we go back for lunch. Eren didn’t argue and I was glad that he’d enjoyed fishing though I was surprised he’d never been before. 

We had lunch and then went out to my shop, deciding to go ahead and take the atv for a ride. I offered to let him drive and he bounced on his feet excitedly. Titan was just as excited for the ride and we went through the trails, riding for a long time. It was nice knowing that Eren was having such a good time and I was enjoying myself just as much. 

By the time we returned to the house, the sun was already setting low in the sky and it was time for a nice hot meal. I left Eren and Titan in the living room while I went into the kitchen to get things started and was busy chopping vegetables for the skewers when Eren came over and asked if he could help. 

I told him to get the steaks I had out of the refrigerator and wash them so I could cut them for the kebabs. He did as I said and then together we put everything in place. They looked delicious already, the variety of vegetables along with the meat making my mouth water. Once they were ready we went outside and I started the grill on the back patio. Eren sat on the outdoor couch, looking around. He seemed impressed, but didn’t say much. I knew the place was nice but I was used to it. 

When the grill was ready, I put the skewers on and then joined Eren on the couch. The night was upon us and it felt much cooler now, but it was still comfortable. I enjoyed being outside like this and I couldn’t deny that it wasn’t lonesome at all with Eren next to me and Titan running around the yard energetically. 

“It’s been a long time since I stopped and took a break.” Eren mused.

“It’s important to take time for yourself sometimes. But it’s good that you’re so focused on school.” It was still surprising to me that he was so dedicated. “What are your plans for after college?”

He tilted his head back against the couch and closed his eyes, enjoying the breeze. “I want to be a forensic scientist. Finding the truth with hard evidence, using it to go back in time and see what happened. I’m aiming to go right into the field once I finish school and at least get an internship.”

I was impressed and thankful that he had concrete goals. “With your grades, you won’t have any trouble.” I told him with certainty. Any place would be lucky to have someone as bright and determined as Eren working for them. “I’m sure you’ll make it.”

“Hearing you say that makes me feel like I can.” He smiled softly. “I’ll do my best.”

“You always do.” I said quietly, more to myself than to him as I got up to check the skewers. I couldn’t wait to eat. It wouldn’t be much longer. “You can go find a movie if you want, it won’t take me long here.”

“Alright.” He said and stood, stretching his back. “Any preference on the genre?” 

As long as if wasn’t sexual, I didn’t care. “I’m not picky.” I muttered as I turned the skewers and inhaled the delicious aroma. 

Eren left quietly and I thought over our time together this weekend. It was fun, I couldn’t deny that but it was also very,  _ very  _ trying. I hoped that maybe Eren would give up, find someone his own age and forget about me. That gave me something to look forward to. And then, we could be friends. I would like to be his friend. Maybe because I didn’t have many. 

As if I’d thought up the only person I truly considered a friend, I turned when I heard a vehicle pulling up and frowned at seeing Erwin’s truck. We’d been friends since we were kids and he had a habit of showing up at the lake house unannounced, trying to get me drunk just so he could laugh at me because I never drank. He stepped out of his truck with a grin, holding up a case of beer. 

“I knew you’d be here. And you’re grilling? I came at the perfect time.”

_ Far from it.  _ “It’s late for you to show up here.” I shook my head as he walked over and handed me a beer. I really didn’t want to drink. But I wasn’t about to be letting him tease me, so I opened it and took a swallow. 

“Well it was a last minute thing.” He shrugged and opened one for himself after setting the case on the couch. “It’s been like two months since we had a drink together.”

“I’ve been busy with the new job…”  _ And a certain student who is inside.  _ “But I uh… have someone over right now.”

“What?” Erwin sputtered, raising his brows. “You never being a piece of ass down here.”

_ No. I never did.  _ “Well, he’s not a piece of ass.” I muttered and had a sip of the drink. “Just a friend.”

“Since when?” He snorted and started chugging his beer, not stopping until it was gone. “Friend my ass. You’re lying to me now?”

I rolled my eyes and drained my beer just as he had, but it nearly killed me. “Ek. Just relax. It’s not what you think. But you can’t stay.”

“Now you’re kicking me to the curb?” He held his arms up in shock. “Who are you?”

“I’m serious, Erwin. Nothing is going on but I’m not sure how he’d feel about you showing up like this so you’ll have to come back another time.”

Erwin scoffed and put another beer in my hand before taking a seat on the couch with another of his own. “I’m not leaving.”

I grimaced as I checked the skewers and then opened the bottle for a swig. “Don’t be like that.” I sighed, knowing it wasn’t a good idea to even let him see Eren.

“Well shit, I’m jealous. You make a new friend so you don’t have time for me anymore.” He laughed. 

“Don’t piss me off, I’ll kick your ass.” I threatened as I closed the grill and turned to look at him. “Seriously, I need you to leave.”

“Nope.” He grinned wickedly at me. “Not until I see you drunk. Then I’ll go.”

“What?!” I snapped. “I can’t get drunk that fast.” 

“Better get started.” He taunted me and I started drinking. 

It was so like him to do this to me and it was so hard to drink for me anyway. But if I had to drink to get him to leave, I would. I drank as fast as I could, finishing two more beers in record time before it hit me and I groaned. Way too much for me. I had no tolerance for alcohol. 

“One more and I’ll go.” Erwin said cheekily and opened another one for me. I shook my head, still groaning. 

“No more.” I whined and then belched. I felt a lot better after that but still didn’t want to drink more. 

“Drink it.” He snickered and I frowned, but started draining the beer until it was gone and I was definitely feeling it. 

“Okay now I’ll kidnap you.” He laughed and in my sudden burst of intoxication, snuck up on me and hoisted me over his shoulder.

_ Fucking brute.  _

“Put me the fuck down!” I roared, elbowing him harshly in the neck. 

“Ah, shit Levi!” He hissed and I kneed him in the gut, forcing him to double over and he dropped me on the grass. 

“Bastard!” I tackled him and was ready to knock the hell out of him but he quickly scrambled from under me, knocking me on my back and causing the air to rush out of my lungs. 

While I laid there, recovering, he ran to his truck and left and I groaned. Now I was laying in the grass, drunk and needed to get those skewers off the grill. With a sigh I got up slowly and dusted myself off, blanching when I spotted Eren at the grill, pulling the skewers off. I wondered how much he saw as I walked over, hoping he couldn’t tell that I’d had anything to drink. I didn’t drink. Ever. 

“So . . . a friend of yours?” He asked, referring to Erwin.

“Not any fucking more damn bastard.” I grumbled, far too old for his shenanigans. I needed to sit down. 

“I see.” He chuckled and then raised an eyebrow at me. “Is that . . . you smell like beer.”

I stiffened and avoided his eyes. “Don’t know what you talking about.” I huffed and crossed my arms, knowing my words came out all wrong. I had to sit down for a minute. 

“Well that was fast.” He mused before closing the grill. “I’ve got the movie all set up, let’s go in and eat.” He suggested, picking up the plates he had put the skewers on.

There was no way I could eat until some of this beer left my system. Drinking so fast and so much left me feeling full and I didn’t like being so intoxicated. I couldn’t let Eren know I’d actually drank anything. I led the way inside slowly, thinking up an excuse not to eat right away. 

“I think uh I… my back. I’m just gonna sit.” I mumbled on my way to the couch. I fell down on it and breathed deeply, closing my eyes. I was going to kick Erwin’s ass for this. 

Eren set the plates on the table before joining me on the couch. “Alright, time to get this movie started.” He said and pressed play on the DVD remote.

I didn’t bother opening my eyes to ever see what he’d picked, too distracted with the light feeling taking over my body. I couldn’t believe this happened to me. Why were all these things happening to me? Luckily Eren didn’t seem to notice my current state and he was busy watching the movie. But then out of nowhere I had to piss like never before and I sat up, groaning. 

“Shit.” I got up a little more wobbly than I liked and hurried to the bathroom. 

It was definitely a relief to let all that out, but it certainly didn’t sober me up. I figured maybe I should just go to bed or else Eren would figure it out for sure. I thought it over for a moment, just standing in the hallway before making up my mind to go to bed. But then I came to the stairs and stared at them knowing that it was not happening. 

Sighing in defeat, I went back into the living room and fell on the couch, curling into a ball and closing my eyes. I would just sleep here and he wouldn’t know anything. 

“Are you alright?” Eren asked and leaned over to look at me. 

I moved my hand to his face and pushed him away. “Don’t look at me.” I said, voice muffled. 

“Wow.” He giggled. “You’re really a lightweight, huh?” 

_ What the fuck.  _ “What’re you talking bout. I just… hurt back.” I sighed. I was getting nowhere. 

“You know very well how smart I am, Levi senpai.” He pointed out. “Don’t bother trying to pull a fast one on me, even when you’re drunk. Now then . . . are you going to sleep here?”

I  _ really  _ wish he wouldn’t call me that. “Can I just need a fucking minute. Shit.” I muttered and pulled the pillow from under my head to cover my face with it. 

“You need a glass of water . . . or a nap.” He said and paused the movie. “Hang on, I'll go get you a blanket.”

_ What is he, my babysitter?  _ “I’m fucking fine! I don’t need nothing.” I grumbled from under the pillow. 

“Not listening!” He yelled from what sounded like down the hall. He was back a few moments later and threw a blanket over me, fussing with the edges as he tucked me in. “There.”

“But… so hot.” I breathed, wanting to strip but wasn’t nowhere near drunk enough to give him the pleasure. 

“Okay, one sec.” He said and was off again. Once he came back, he took his seat on the couch and untucked the bottom of the blanket to throw over his lap. “Is that better? I turned the air up a bit.”

“Whatever.” I sighed and shoved the pillow away from my face, making it fall on the floor. 

Eren giggled again before pressing play on the movie. “I’m going to finish this while you sleep.”

“I’m not going to sleep.” I told him, annoyed. My eyes wandered from him to the tv and I cringed when I saw the movie he was playing. Didn’t I say nothing sexual? Oh no… I just thought that. “Why are you watching this?” 

“Because I like this movie.” He explained. “Don’t you? Dirty Dancing is a classic.”

I rolled my eyes. “Not for your virgin eyes.” I mumbled. 

“Really?” He just shook his head and reached for a skewer. 

“Really. Find something pg.”

He took a few bites before responding. “No. We’ve been over this. I’m an adult and you’re sure as hell not telling me what I can and can’t watch.”

“So mean to me.” I muttered to myself, taken aback by his attitude. 

Eren looked over at me a couple times and then paused the movie again. “I’m sorry I snapped at you . . . I just don’t want you treating me like a child. It’s degrading, you know?”

I frowned and looked away from him. “But to me you are a kid.”

“And to me you’re an old man, but you don’t see me treating you like one.” He countered. “Look, I know the age difference is hard to get over . . . I had to come to terms with it myself. But I’m hopeful we can move past it. I don’t mind you treating me like I’m younger because I am, just don’t treat me like I’m five.”

I sat up and looked at him seriously. “If you remembered me so well you’d fucking know that I don’t treat you like you’re a baby anymore. Because I know you’re not.”

“Then tell your drunk brain to let me watch what I want to.” He said and then sighed. “Maybe I’m being sensitive about it . . . but I don’t like being reminded how out of reach you are . . .”

“Yet you remind me that I’m an old man.” I snorted. “As if I didn’t already know that.”  _ An old man with a virgin student trying to get close to him.  _

Eren gave me a small smile at that. “You’re not old, just older.” He corrected.

“... You called me an old man.” I reminded with a scowl. 

“Because you called me a kid.” He said and then added, “Whatever happened to the phrase young adult? You could have at least given me that.” 

“You’re right. You’re a young adult and you can watch whatever you want. Even porn.” I shrugged. 

Eren flushed and crossed his arms. “There’s nothing wrong with that.” He huffed.

I cocked a brow as I studied him. “So you do then?” I couldn’t stop myself from asking. 

“Well . . .” He said. “Not as much as in the past, but yeah. Sometimes. It’s not a big deal.”

It wasn’t. Not at all. “I’m curious…” I thought aloud, wondering what he was into. I still couldn’t believe he was a virgin. 

“About?” He inquired.

“Huh?” I blinked at him until I realized I’d voiced my thoughts. “Oh, nothing.”

He eyed me for a moment before picking up the remote again. “Shall we get back to the movie?”

“Yeah.” I muttered, unsure why I was so disappointed. 

He hit play and finished off the skewer he’d been working on, grabbing another after. I finally felt up to eating but didn’t have the appetite for more than two skewers even though they were delicious. It was a nice distraction. Maybe it was the alcohol that got to me, but thankfully Eren had kept me in check probably without even realizing it because I just couldn’t trust myself with him. Not after drinking like that. Things opened up too much and I felt so much more at ease. I couldn’t slip up like this again. I would watch this movie but then I was going straight to bed. 

“I swear, this movie always makes me envious.” Eren said after a while.

“I don’t know why.” I said as I chewed on a piece of steak. 

“Because I can’t dance to save my life.” He chuckled. “It’s sad, honestly.”

“That’s… surprising.” He seemed like the type who could dance well. “It’s probably because you’re such a virgin.”

He turned his head towards me, narrowing his eyes. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“A lot.”

He scowled, but it turned into a pout. “Baby was a virgin too, but she danced well.”

“Yeah when he broke her ass in.” I laughed. 

“She still did it.” He insisted. “So it doesn’t matter.”

“If you were fucking you’d be able to dance for sure.” Hell, even I could dance. 

He paused the movie yet again. “What’s the difference? People who’ve had sex know how to move their hips? Please, I can do that much. I don’t see what it has to do with anything.”

“Forget I said anything. I don’t know anything. Besides, it was a joke.” I said quickly and finished the last of my skewer. 

“Oh no you don’t. You’re a professor so educate me.”

How ridiculous. “I’m off the clock.”

“And with a student, try again.” He said stubbornly. “Come on, I want to know. Tell me.”

“Oh but right now you’re not my student… if you were you wouldn’t be here.”

Eren groaned. “Levi senpai. Just explain it to me. It has the possibility of saving my dance career.”

He really was too much. “No.”

“But why?” He whined.

“You know why.”

He fell dramatically on top of the armrest of the couch before clicking play, finally letting it go and I smiled. He really was cute… sometimes. 

When the movie finally ended I stretched. “Time for bed, kiddo.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He said and got up. “Can I sleep with you?”

“Okay.” I agreed just to see how he would react. 

“W-what?” He squeeked, turquoise eyes going wide.

I stood up, fighting a smile and offering him my hand. “Come on.”

He stared at my hand like it was a foreign object before his cheeks went red. “Alright.” He said quietly, taking my hand.

_ Shit. Way to go Levi. We’re going to jail now. Fuck it.  _

I thought that I could just tease him and he would shy away from me. But he didn’t. I couldn’t really back down now even though I knew it was wrong of me. I pulled him up to my room and closed the door behind us. He stood just inside the door for a moment and I sighed, realizing I wouldn’t be able to go to sleep without a shower. 

“Make yourself comfortable. I’m going to shower.”

Eren nodded and I went to my dresser and got some boxers and a pair of pajama bottoms. It didn’t take me long to shower and I returned to the bedroom, half expecting Eren to be gone but he wasn’t. He was under the covers and looked comfy. It wasn’t really a big deal I supposed. I could control myself. As long as he didn’t try me. 

I pulled the cover back to get in bed beside him, brow twitching at the fact that he was laying in the middle. I said nothing though as I laid on my back for a moment of thought. What was wrong with me? Eren got settled against my side and I could practically feel his happy grin before I even looked at him.

“Goodnight.” I said, closing my eyes and hoping he wouldn’t move around much. 

“Goodnight.” He replied, thankfully not pushing his luck.

I made sure not to touch him, but I didn’t stop him from being so close to me. It was very new and strange for me so it took me a long time to fall asleep, but I was comfortable, wrapped in his warmth and comforting scent. For something to be so wrong, it couldn’t have felt more right. 


End file.
